If there is no God, there is no reason for me to be here any more and I will carry out to completion what I started before (a couple here know what I'm talking about). At present, I have what I would call experiential evidence for His existence, I don't believe I'm deluded. If that's what sees me through life and I get to the end and there is nothing, it won't matter.
Some might say I'm operating on Pascal's wager and I may be to an extent, except I don't base my 'need' to believe in God on what happens or doesn't happen after I die. I base it on the here and now.
In my life I've gone through times when I've had faith, and I've gone through times when I've had very little to no faith.
I think I was happier when I've had faith, when a part of me was childlike.
Somehow I allowed myself to think so much that I've made myself miserable. And in my thinking I destroyed my faith.
It seems like faith is like a pair of elastic banded underwear, once you stretch the elastic band out it never comes back, Maybe thats what they mean about sinning against the holy spirit, Stretching the elastic band out of your faith. Then your lost.
Some of us can think enough to make ourselves miserable and some of us are blessed and spend our days watching television.