I hate love;(
So, you're in love with someone that you're not compatible with ....
by Frequent_Fader_Miles 44 Replies latest social relationships
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kerj2leev
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momzcrazy
Thinking you can change anyone is dangerous ground. Either take them as they are or move on. It hurts to slam your head against a brick wall.
momz
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Frequent_Fader_Miles
It hurts to slam your head against a brick wall.
Wow momz! That's certainly a graphic way to put it.
Graphic, but accurate.
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momzcrazy
Self descriptive. My head against the brick wall that is my husband. When I gave up trying to change him, he became much happier. He also liked me a bit more.
momz
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Ancient One
People who want to change somebody are never happy, they skip from one relationship to another and finally end up alone or feeling 'alone' in a relationship they've got.
The better way is to respect each other's space and give as much allowance as it is practical, each person should really work on themselves not on someone else. The key here is not how to change things but how to make things work with what you've got if you can't make it then move on.
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Frequent_Fader_Miles
When I gave up trying to change him, he became much happier. He also liked me a bit more.
So would you say that what you were trying to change could've been easily overlooked instead?
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Frequent_Fader_Miles
People who want to change somebody are never happy, they skip from one relationship to another and finally end up alone or feeling 'alone' in a relationship they've got.
I wonder how long it usually takes to realize this? I like the way you phrased it.
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White Dove
I would keep him as a f*** buddy if he is decent enough but nothing more than that, unless he makes a good friend in which case he could become a friend with benefits I made a promise to myself to never again get overly attached to one person but to make many friends and have some benefits with some of them. Monogamy is not natural. -
White Dove
Oh, that's what it's about. Sorry. Forget changing them. It only works in Hollywood. Either take him as he is or don't keep him. I hate the whole ownership sound of that. We don't own people, so how is it our business to change anyone, including our own children. We guide our kids but take them as they are. -
skeeter1
If kids are not in the picture, then you could consider leaving.
If kids are in the picture, look for common ground.
Skeeter