The only three reasons to miss a meeting?

outofthebox

Setting: Sunday talk

Brother giving the talk (BGTT): 'A CO told me' (he said that as in God told me), 'the only three reasons for missing a meeting are...' (drum roll) ... 'the three Fs'.

Me (thinking): WTF? Mmm. This maybe a good post for the forum (That's right, I think of you guys when I go to the meetings).

BGTT: What are the 3 Fs, you may ask?

Me (thinking): Guess the 3 Fs I am thinking!

BGTT: 1) Fever, 2) Fracture 3) Funeral. That's right brothers, unless you are sick with a fever, or a fracture and you can't walk or you are in your funeral (how creepy is that) you shouldn't miss a meeting. (He looked so proud). I see a bunch of JW saying yes with the head (actually without the head, if you catch my drift).

Me (thinking): So, there is no other reason to miss a repetitive meeting? What if I am in a war zone? or what if I am taking care of other people? or what if I am crazy and I want to kill everybody? What if I am on holiday in a cruise? What if... oh, forget it. What you are saying is stupid. But, let me write it down for my friends in the forum. They always appreciate a good laugh.

-ootb.

ButtLight

What if its Karaoke night at the local Bar? Geese, whats more important?

jaguarbass

Sound like he was having a good sales meeting in the public talk.

Thats what you get each time you go to the hall is a pep rally.

mrsjones5

Hm...so being in the throes of labor about to give birth is not a good enough reason either...what a bunch of crap!

Abandoned

What if you realize the meetings are just dysfunctional offshoots of a highly dysfunctional and toxic cult? Can you miss a meeting then? It doesn't start with F.

betterdaze

The *other* 3 Fs:

1) Frustrated by the teachings

2) Fed up with the lies

3) Football!

~Sue

stillajwexelder

What about helping build a nearby Kingdom Hall?

What about ones worldy (or even baptised) family member ill in hospital?

What if you car broke down?

Some elders are absolute BUFFOONS

tula

What if the dog ate my magazine?

(They really seem to hate it when I call it magazine instead of "publication". Why is that?)

compound complex

"Just to let you know we're thinking of you during this testing time regarding your health. The principle in the scripture that things are established by having 2 or 3 witnesses, can be applied to accepting a diagnosis of our health. Let 2 or 3 independent authorities agree about it then we in the congregation can accept it. One's spiritual health must not be neglected."

done4good's comment, 23 December 2006, on Minimus' thread asking if you were ever falsely accused by the elders for anything.

DaCheech

my meeting was snowed out 2 times this year!

snow starts with "s"

I guess my elders would rethink the snow days, even if the parking lot is iced up, and elderly people are falling......... thus going back to the "broken leg" reason

The only three reasons to miss a meeting?

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