Do you shun Jw's now?

AK - Jeff

I have gone thru phases with this. I sometimes have forced Jw's who shun me to speak, or be embarrassed if they don't. Then I let up on that as the hurting lessened over time. Now, I sometimes find that I just don't wish to even acknowledge those people, and sometimes I actually shun them.

Part of it is that I know I would not have anything to speak to them about - and that they wouldn't speak anyway. But also, I am finding that I just wouldn't want to speak with them - they are hateful, spiteful, little people with big egos and a bigger opinion of themselves. I just am beginning to find that I don't want anything to do with the people who call themselves Jehovah's Witnesses any longer.

I find it strange to say that - those people were my life for the first 48 years of my life. I guess I am healing. Sometimes I miss certain ones - but as time goes on, I don't even think of those people often - Amen.

Is your experience similar. Is the old tonic 'Time heals all wounds', what is happening here?

Jeff

Abandoned

I can't remember the last time I've seen a witness, so I really don't know if I shun them or not.

flipper

AKJEFF- About the only witnesses I deal with are a few of my witness relatives who will talk to me. The rest of my relatives won't talk with me, so I don't bother. Although I am going to try to get my daughters out of it. I anti-witness to witnesses coming to my door about the child abuse crisis in the organization- as I do if I see any witness street witnessing. But, I don't stay in touch with former friends at all. Trying to make new connections on JWD and other places

R.Crusoe

It is a tricky situation which sorta makes you feel it's up to them to break any silence since it's them who hold the belief to shun Ex JWs. For you to actually speak first feels as if your compromising their belief and deliberately puttilng them in an awkward position.

Twitch

Yea, I don't know if "shun" is the right word. I certainly don't go out of my way like I might for regular "worldy" folk, lol but that goes for most hardcore religious types. I think some part of me will always dislike the mindset of the fundamentalist whether it's jojo or not. But I'd have to say it depends more on how the person and I get along in practical terms. The religious thing is a bias to be sure and I don't feel wrong for having one. It's just not as strong as it once was as I've met many believers who are good people. I don't think in black and white anymore but more in shades of grey,....

Micky4321

I know how you feel. For about 10 years I didn't run into any JW's at all which I thought was odd since I live in the same area I grew up in. But just the last year about I started running into get this my ex mother in law JW and then my brother who is an elder and even stranger at the same store Rainbow foods grocery store. I totally shunned them and pretty much stuck my nose in the air. Things have gotten back to me about what they say about me and it's not nice at all even after a decade.

My brother the elder I had run into at a DMV actually a couple years back and he said hi to me which was awkward but then after that there was a huge family thing for my Grandpa and Grandma. There have been a couple of these things and the first one I was told about and also was told I could not come and then I found out about another one and threw a huge fit pretty much and was going to go no matter what. It wasn't even a JW thing the only JWs that were going to be there were my immediate family. Well my brother the elder said he wasn't coming because I was going to go so hense the shunning of him at the grocery store.

monophonic

i ignored idiots in my hall when i was still active who treated me bad, then i got married and they tried to make nice, but i still looked at them like they were scumbags and walked away.

one elder couldn't even look me in the eyes b/c he knew how wrong they were to be on my ass when i wasn't doing anything wrong....it used to crack my wife up b/c he'd be so nervous around me, when he used to try to pull elder status on me when i was single and then realized he had no clue as to who i was and the prejudice they had against me.

good times.

now that i've been outta there.

Maddie

I think shunning as practiced by the JW's is psychological torture so I couldn't in all good conscience inflict it on anyone. My attitude is that if I can help any JW's to leave the cult then I will, my prime concern being to get my son and his family out of their clutches. I have decided that I won't play their game in honouring their shunning practice if I am shunned which is what they expect.

Maddie

NanaR

Jeff:

Sometimes things get pretty weird. Perhaps because I have never been disfellowshipped or DA'd, many Witnesses are friendly to me. My oldest daughter has a new baby by a man who was raised as a Witness and even baptized. The guy is a total jerk, uses drugs, has been in trouble with the law, etc. but never been "dealt with" by the congregation. His mother is a pioneer, and when our grandson was in the NICU (for 3 months!), she could only go see the baby if my daughter or I would take her.

I took her to see the baby a number of times, and she was very nice to me and didn't Witness to me even. But then I found out that she told my daughter that I told her that I "pray to Jehovah a lot", and that she was quite sure that I am going to "come back" soon. What I actually said to her was that I "pray a lot", and what that really means is that I go to Catholic Mass regularly, pray the Rosary and sometimes the Liturgy of the Hours. Of course I didn't tell her I am becoming Catholic. It is none of her business.

I don't live by their rules anymore so I refuse to shun anybody. But I fully expect that once I am a baptized Catholic (soon!) and that becomes common knowledge, even the lady with whom I share a grandchild will not speak to me.

I think the Golden Rule is correct -- and we do not have to be uncharitable just because these poor brainwashed people believe that that is how they have to act.

Just my 2 cents,

Ruth

mentalclearness

I'm inactive so if I see someone I know by chance on the street I'll say hello. Now if I was df'ed I don't think I would make an effort to go say hi because I agree with R. Crusoe. It seems like it would just create an awkward situation.

Do you shun Jw's now?

Share this