{{{{{{{Cognac}}}}}}}
I'm so sorry this is happening to you.
Peace and good thoughts.
My Husband found out about this site...
by cognac 69 Replies latest jw friends
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carla
He told me that I was like "a dog returning to its vomit"... --- tell him that's exactly how you feel every time he walks into a hall.
It's going to get worse for awhile I predict. May even turn into a scripture volleyball! been there, gets you no where. Study him and realize how much the wt has control of his mind. You can even predict before it comes out of his mouth what he will say, they are so predictable. Then ask him something to really challenge his thinking and he can't answer. Even if you get him to the point of really thinking he will promptly forget it anyway the next time (which will undoubtedly be the next day) he sees jw's or is at a meeting. Unless, he is ready for the truth about the 'truth'.
We have all seen a spouse here have a long range working plan of planting seeds of doubt slowly and carefully, they seem to have been the most successful in getting spouses out. It can take years and years though. It will be hard because you both are trying to find your footing because you left and that has changed the relationship.
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DaCheech
just play along like me.
I go to hall: and just criticize every spupidity of theirs in my own mind
I am free now, they don't own nor control my mind.
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R.Crusoe
I'm wondering if your take on the Bible is 'Gods Word'?
I no longer think that . Took me the last 9 months to completely remove any notion that it is from my brain! The chances are that it isn't and if th elong shot pays off for those on it good luck! I don't see it! I could even stand before God and ask Him how was I supposed to get my head around Him having babies and uneducated people killed because there were no schools in their area! etc etc
A useful video I found was
Not to be taken as fact but as some more information this world has about ALL the ARCHEAOLOGICAL beliefs of people down the years!
Just take in the info and whatever you find interests you and if you don't like it lump it! After a while you'll see the dust start to settle!
It settled for me in areas of pan-entheism zen buddhism toism and atheism with a sprinkling of Wicca who taught me about myself without me having a single fear of spirits - partly due to atheist study .
So I am agnostic because I AM WHAT I AM AT ANY POINT OF STUDY AND EXPERIENCE.
Being under JW influence for me was being completely in a framework of not being who I am and forcing the issue with every waking minute!! Utterly pointless for the total benefit of some guys somewhere I never met sitting in comfortable roles of management as representatives of a significant religious corporation!
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nomoreguilt
Cognac, it was not god's intentions to have a man made organization come between a man and a woman. He slammed the bible down because he knows that you are RIGHT! His own lack of scriptural knowledge is hurting him and he's recognised that you have the upper hand. Men don't like that. Does he intend to inform the BOE of your activities? So long as he doesn't take that course then you are still making your point to him.
I have to admit, you've got great SPUNK kid, temper that with kindness and grace and you may just win him over yet.
NMG
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jgnat
Cognac, you are so direct, I fear your husband can't keep up. He's still so immersed in the teachings, he can't see straight. He sounds very passive-aggressive to me. He says something designed to sting, thinking that will keep you away. But he doesn't talk about his real feelings, like his fears that you might be leaving all that is familiar, maybe drifting away from him.
I'd like to see the two of you stop talking ideas and start sharing heart to heart your fears and dreams.
For a little while.
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freetosee
Thats sad to hear...
A dangerous cult has formed and shaped his mind over many years...hard times are ahead, but nobody know how it will end.
What is so good is that you are not alone, you are well informed, you know the truth about "the truth", and you can here have communications and support anytime. You were not out to find fault with the wt, you just want to do what is right.
You mentioned your husband is a lovely guy...so I sure hope for a happy end!
Strength to you!
freetosee
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kwintestal
That's OK Cognac ... we here at JWD don't want to throw our pearls before swine.
He could have come up with a more original saying. Don't worry though, my wife thought the same thing and then a year later she left too.
Kwin
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FreeWilly
He's probably going to report you to the Elders... be prepared
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FlyingHighNow
I'm sure this has been said, but I can't go back and read all the comments now.
He is your husband and surely you love him dearly. From his point of view you are in grave danger. He does have feelings, even if he is a JW. Try not to get too caught up in your own hurt and disappointment. It's really a very good idea to be careful when you are on line about covering your tracks if you're doing something that might upset your husband. Maybe you should just tell him you are so sorry for upsetting him and then go into stealth mode. You could check JWD out at the library and ask the mods to change your moniker. But if your husband is reading this comment, then the cats out of the bag already.
Hugs.