i screwed up (page 3)

greendawn

The JWs have their own fair share of pedophiles after claiming for years that their org is clean of them, even one GB member was into it. If your wife doesn't like it's her problem. The WTS was suppressing the issue for years in order to avoid paying damages to victims something in the end they had to do abundantly. It's amazing the WTS for once had to pay money to its victims.

VoidEater

In any marriage, disagreements will flare. Hortensia gives great perspective - it may be time to first reestablish normal relations, then more carefully approach the concern at a future date.

yknot

Welcome seeking help......

Some things take time.... (my husband has been waiting for 12 years...but hey it has paid off!)

I agree let her cool off from the situation before preceding.

Take a look at what Barbara Anderson has said:

http://www.freeminds.org/women/barbdiscovery.htm

http://www.watchtowerdocuments.com/ to purchase the CD

and finally Barbara occassionally post here under : AndersonsInfo

While Witnesses have been warned of apostate infiltrated media...court documents are hard to argue.

Best Wishes

digderidoo

even one GB member was into it

Who was that? Has anyone got any links i can read about that?

Paul

ImFreeatlast

Welcome to the board Seeking Help. You are among friends here.

I spent 8 years helping my wife to see that 'the truth' was not the truth. I agree with Mouthy's comments, Try and take the heat off the situation first. It might hurt the ego to back down but trust me it is worth it. I posted how i got my wife out a little while ago but I was in a different situation in that I was brought up a JW and know the lies, but this site can help you there. Dont think that this is going to be a quick trip. The imbeded defence of the religion is so strong that they will not listen to ANY attack no matter WHO it is that is saying it.

I know it hurts to think that she will put the religion before you, but believe me when I say that that is because of what she has been taught. NOT how she feels about you. I nearly lost my wife when i first started questioning things and it took a long time to build the trust back up with her. But take heart, it can be done, it just takes time.

Best of luck mate, let us know how you go.

Mr Ben

Your kids come first. The Witlesses are not like just any religion. There are worse ones, of course, but not many. The problem is that the pedos in JWland know that the official rules protect them. In JWland the abused child needs two witnesses to the assault or there is no case for the elders to hear. Simple, pedos in JWland know and use this as cover over an over. Do not let your kids be without you at the meetings, studies etc or alone with another witness. That's right, not even the women. Why? The women will not blink at letting your kids go preach or study alone with a male witness. I suppose you can make a rule that your kids must never be alone with the male witlesses.

On the other hand, as the head of the family, you could head up a study of the Creation Book using... http://www.dimaggio.org/Heretic/critical.htm as a guide.

Good luck!

jgnat

Welcome, seeking help. I, too, am a non-JW married to a witness. I, too, freaked out when I discovered how deep my hubby was involved in an organization that frankly, is dangerous. I also regretted that outburst and it literally took years to recover.

I highly recommend Steve Hassan's books on Combatting Cult Mind Control. www.freedomofmind.com He shows how you can draw out the natural personality of your wife and help her think for herself.

Do keep in touch. I'm willing to keep sharing hints and tips as long as you need them.

seeking help

Hey Y'all,

last nite was the bookstudy. i used to coment a bit when i felt like it. never at the hall though. anyway 1 paragraph was about catholic chruch and AID's (what a stupid,stupid reasoning that is..but i digress) so the conductor starts spouting about child abuse. my wife looks at me a smiles.. my hand shoots up.. not sure what i was gonna say.. didnt get called on. afterward she asks what i was gonna comment. i said i wasn't sure but i wouldn't embarrass her. i asked 1 of the elders about the abuse settlement and he said that there were no settlement that he was aware of but it wouldn't suprise him. i am wondering if i should forward the CNBC link to him. any thoughts on that?

Tired of the Hypocrisy

first off, welcome!

All I can say is watch your kids. I am sutre you do a great job, but if she is in la la land about this, you cannot trust her judgement. If the kids are invited to a sleepover, be sure you are involved in the decision. If it were me, I wouldn't allow any of my kids to sleep over a jw's house. But that is me and I have long and deep issues with the way the jw's treated my family.

Hortensia

I would be hesitant about forwarding the info to the elder. It's your wife you are most concerned with and if you get the reputation of being a doubter or in any way rebellious, your wife might start getting pressure from the congregation. Just share a little with her now and then, and share a smile with her at the meeting when anything patently ridiculous is said. It was good of you to reassure her that you wouldn't embarrass her.

i screwed up

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