My Husband Thinks I'm an Idiot...

by cognac 31 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  cognac

  attacking one's intelligence because
  of their faith or changing of faith is really not a good thing for spouses.

  Yeah, I thought we had gotton past that... I won't be around my parents because they did that to me and its not right for mates to do that...

  He means, "Things a 2-year old can be manipulated into
  going along with to please his parents until he's sure he always understood it.

  Yes, I think that's what he means...

  so cognac...be patient with your husband....hubby is blind ..or maybe he is doing what he feels he has to do to keep peace in the rest of his life...the path of least resistance.....too bad that means not having peace with you......... just show him you love him.

  Thanks for the encouragement Snakes.

  How about asking him a question from this list every day over breakfast? http://www.corsinet.com/braincandy/stupid.html

  Until he caves and admits your brilliance.

  I should try that, lol

  Good luck with things over the next few months until you switch KHs.

  We all sympathize with the nastiness you're going through.

  thanks
• 

  IP_SEC

  He told me that he was really attracted to how deep of a person I was before we got married.

  Then adds in, "But then you started questioning simple things. Things 2 year olds understand..."

  Translation: I used to like this brainy woman before she started dissenting my beliefs. Now her brains threaten me.
• 

  Octarine Prince
• 

  Octarine Prince

  Bingo!
  
  Tell him he is projecting his inadequacies.
• 

  John Doe

  Just remember that questioning someone's intelligence for a differing viewpoint is an indication that the person doesn't have a strong argument and is being defensive. It allows him to dismiss your view without having to analyze it. In technical terms, it's an "ad hominem" aka "against the man" argument.
• 

  cognac

  Translation: I used to like this brainy woman before she started dissenting my beliefs. Now her brains threaten me.

  Yes, that's true. Evidently, I'm still "smart" in business things now...

  Just remember that questioning someone's intelligence for a differing viewpoint is an indication that the person doesn't have a strong argument and is being defensive. It allows him to dismiss your view without having to analyze it. In technical terms, it's an "ad hominem" aka "against the man" argument.

  hmmm, that's very true. I notice the people that attack me personally never do have a strong argument... Hubby always has to "research" my questions and never gets back to me, yet, evidently a 2 year old gets this stuff...
• 

  Bumble Bee

  I hear ya cognac. My husband NEVER listened to my advice, suggestions, opinions, thoughts and it's tiresome. He always had to get a "second opinion" and come back a few days later and say "I was talking to so and so about such and such and he said this". I would say "um, does that sound even the least little bit familiar to you?" He'd think about it for a second and say "oh yeah, you said that exact same thing, didn't you?" D'uh!! When the one person you should be able to discuss things with dismisses you, it hurts.

  Your opinions, thoughts, feelings, questions MATTER and don't EVER let him make you feel like they don't. You seem like a pretty strong person, tell him how that makes you feel, each and every time he does it, maybe he'll start feeling like the idiot for the way he's making you feel.

  BB
• 

  TD

  "But then you started questioning simple things. "

  To doubt is to question and to question is to think

  Thinking does not an idiot make.
• 

  momzcrazy

  Not questioning makes a person an idiot. It is our job as humans to question and learn. That brings changes but it also fills our souls.

  momz
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  DaCheech