Met an exJW when I was out Friday Night. His pain broke my heart. (page 2)

darth frosty

I have a friend in a similar mind set. I grew up with this guy and the elders and dubs never really paid any attention to him. By the time he finished HS his witness career was basically over. Problem is he still believes its the 'truth'. Says he feels in his heart it is right. I have shared points with him that prove(IMO) that it is a false front, but that conditioning is powerfull.

Hope4Others

Directing him to Jwd would really help as it was pointed out, but what if you also had him get the book

"Cult mind control" by Steve Hassan....I'm waiting for mine in the mail. I think it could really put an end to to

"What if" the big A next week idea for those still in fear. Seeing and understanding the tactics could benefit anyone

greatly hopefully bringing a sort of "Ah" and "Relief". You finally just understand it all.

cheers

hope4others

Galileo

Give him "Crisis of Conscience" and "The Gentile Times Reconsidered". And point him to www.jwfacts.com. It has the most concise list of evidence against the WTB&TS that I've ever seen.

mouthy

I would sugggest he read Crises of Conscience ...Poor soul. I walked around for two years still feeling it was truth Until I went to PA convention of EX JWS & listened to all their terrible stories about shunning loved ones. I realized that was NOT LOVE>>> So was able to "dump" the WT theology

Anti-Christ

Unfortunately I see this a lot, just recently I bumped into an old JW friend who just left her husband for an other man. She told me she was unhappy for years and she had a major depression last year. I said to her that I was glad to hear that she is better and I told her that leaving the JW was the first step to recovery... but she said "no I what to go back, I believe it's the truth" ..!!!?, I don't get it, can't they see it's the teachings of the JW that is making them so unhappy? It's not easy helping them because even if there are DFed they still thing talking to an "apostate" is wrong and they are afraid to think that the JW are wrong.

Flowerpetal

I agree, it does take a while to start shedding and unlearn all that we have learned taught by the society.

Although I don't have any experience in helping any df'd., persons who want to go back, I would encourage them to read or attempt to read some of Rutherford's books, and see what a turn-off he was. He was nothing but bombastic and high-minded, yet he was a president of the WT and representing an organization which boasts of having God's approval. What a far cry from how Jesus was!

Hortensia

I feel so sorry for folks who can't move on and feel doomed like that. Fucking religion. I hope you can show him by example that a different life is possible. He might need counseling for a while, it does help.

AudeSapere

Crisis of Conscience and In Search of Christian Freedom may help him if he still believes it's 'the truth'.

Sad. Very sad.

-Aude.

10p

I will second, or third, or fourth or whatever ... that you give him Crisis of Conscience as a gift.

Ray's tone in that book is very loving and concerned ... its a great book. My sister was in a kind of similar situation - disfellowshipped, but still believed it was the truth ... though she did have some doubts too. I recommended she read CoC and now she is free, and her mental illness is a thousand times better.

Same thing with my father. CoC set him free too. And I personally think it is the best book to read, because Ray lets you out gently, he doesn't send you into a fiery rage against the org and everyone in it - you come out with more love and a level head. Hopefully it can do the same for your new acquaintance, and hopefully new friend.

wildfell

All of the suggested reading made here is excellent if you are ready to hear what those books/websites have to say. But if he is really depressed and perhaps suicidal, I wonder whether it may be too much for him to undertake right now? There is a lot of initial guilt at looking at 'apostate' material, and then the distress of finding out the truth about the jw's can be overwhelming.

You are right, he does need therapy and maybe antidepressants. He has been out for 8 years. He may be unaware that the society has softened its stance on getting medical attention and counselling for depression etc. I knew MANY jw's who were on antidepressants - about half of them were elders wives! Once he is more stable within himself he may be in a position to look at crisis of conscience and jwfacts.com.

It's great that you can be there for him.

Met an exJW when I was out Friday Night. His pain broke my heart.

Share this