by Robert7 35 Replies latest jw friends
Here are the facts:
You have the right to privacy, you could tell them you will get back with them when you are ready to talk and you respectfully request that they stop calling.
The JW's are a social sub-culture all their own, they do not respect the rights and freedoms of anyone and will probably freak out at your assertiveness.
I doubt there's any good way to get around this, I would try to pick the lesser of two evils if I were you.
Wow, Gary...........those are all really good suggestions. Good job.
Gary That would really get them (the elders) going. LOL I would love to see a video of them being confronted like that and getting a taste of their own medicine.
In my opinion I think Robert and his wife would find meeting with the elders to be a very emotional experience and they would not be in any state to be confrontational. They still feel guilty in someways. I myself could have never approached it that way because I am too emotional and wear my heart on my sleeve.
Velvetann
I don't know what city u live in but u could "escape" by telling the PO u are going to give a new KH an opportunity to liven things up for u. Pick a cong far from your home where they don't know u. attend a few meetings and disappear. They won't follow up
When I escaped the tower in 83.
I didnt answer the phone or the door.
I am still in good standing.
At least I can go to family get togethers, everyone talks to me.
All the witnesses in the Tampa bay area say hi and talk to me in the home depot or whereever they see me. And not about God.
They just dont ask me to give the public talk anymore.
If the do, I miss it because I dont answer my phone, and screen my calls.
I havent been inside a kingdom hall since 83.
Not answering the phone and door.
Is like giving them a message with your mouth.
Just more succinct and profound.
While at the same time having a vague and ambiguous character.
Kind of paradoxical.
When someone is in trouble with the law and the have a good lawyer.
The lawyer doesnt allow the accused to speak to his accusers and delays and postpones the trial until everyones memory is cloudy and hazzy and they forget and dont care anymore.
That's my advice.
If you meet with them tell them you are encouraged and you want to reach out. Then do not go to another meeting. Keep doing this until it wears them out. That is unless they have something on you. Then deny unless there are 2 witnesses. If there are, do not meet with them.- Also, Do you have a CO visit in the next 60 days? If so don't worry about it, It is just a CYA visit by them.
Good suggestions Gary !! I didn't encounter anybody that "intelligent" about dealing with elders. It was the "emotional" ones that scared the entire BoE. There were a few "sisters" that after the elders called to set up a 'shepherding call', the sisters kept calling them back... and calling... and calling... leaving messages with wives and children... taking up hours of time... keeping them late after the meetings. They had issues with what anyone said or did and never forgot anything. When the CO visited, they were first in line to talk... if they hadn't already called him, too. There were actual situations where the hounders were so hounded that they secretly prayed that "friends" would just go away.
treadnh2o, Good one. Now I do recall some like that. A couple elders would go and "encourage" them. They'd be sooo receptive, "Oh, yes, it's been rough but now we're gonna do better." The 'shepherding' would be brief, they'd show up for a meeting, maybe go in service once, and disappear again. Since none of the BoE were diehard, confrontational, no one would bother 'shepherding' any more. Not worth the effort.
B the X
JaguarOnBass knows whats up. Same basic thing worked for me 19 years ago and seems to continue. I do get suspicious at times that some do gooder relative might get things rustled up. Family contact for my kids and siblings are what keep me from DAing myself.
The sound of one hand clapping.
Thanks again for all your great comments. For immediate damage control, I called by BS conductor (my PO is the one who called me) and played all nice simply saying that I prefer to talk with him as we have a rapport, versus NO rapport with my PO. This BS conductor is really a nice guy, and he seems sincere to just help, and not kick us out. (NO idea what agenda the PO has)
I then said that my wife has been having a hard time recently, and simply said some things she didn't mean. I really tried playing it all down. But I said that we're not ready to meet with the elders, and can we defer it. Additionally I asked that when we meet in the future that he and another specific brother meet, since we have a relationship, and it makes my wife more comfortable.
So I played it down, deferred it, and defined (or at least requested) which brothers we will meet with. At this point I feel that the brothers will try to 'encourage' us and will likely leave us alone for a while.
