bluesbreaker59,
I'm one of those that believes it should be a committed relationship. ...no one night stands... But that's MY BELIEFBasically, I agree: I've done both, and I prefer committed relationships -- because they are more nourishing and MORE FUN. One-night stands can indeed be disappointing -- not in the Victorian-drama sense -- just frustrating. It's up to the individual to decide whether it's better than enforced celibacy.gently feral
Non-committed relationships can be fun, but I wouldn't want to 'live' there. After my divorce from an uber-dub, I went thru a period of "enforced celibacy," thinking anything else was a "sin". We were both told by the Elders we "...must remain celibate for the rest of our lives, because there had been no adultery. If either of you mess-up or remarry you'll be DF." That lasted 5 l-o-n-g years !
When I finally broke loose from those mental/religious chains I went a little 'feral' myself. At first -- my WT trained conscience was killing me. But the experiences were NOTHING like I was told it would be. Sex was fun ! It was a relief, kind & gentle. I was always told it was always empty and non-satisfying. I discovered just how important human touch was to myself and other people...even if it was 'temporary'. For me...it helped end a deep depression and proved to me that these so-called "evil, worldly people" were in fact (there are always exceptions) normal, loving people-who-need-people.
In my opinion, those people helped 'save' me from my myself and my past. I eventually married one of those 'worldly' people and I am free-er and happier in my life than ever before.
Never discount the Power of Human Touch. I read a Reader's Digest article a few years ago about newborn babies in a large hospital ward. This ward had a lot of babies, where most of the parents never showed up much, if at all. The doctors, nurses, aides and guests could walk thru the ward on a certain path. It was common for someone to stop, look, touch and talk to the babies along that path. Their empathy made them do this.
I think it was a nurse, that started noticing something interesting. There were always babies that would die, but, she noticed that it was almost never the babies that lived on that path -- the one where the babies got the most attention, voices, human touch. She talked to others and they experimented, putting sicker babies in that sweet path. Guess what usually happened ? Later bigger studies proved that babies can literally not thrive without human touch and empathy.
I don't think we adults are much different -- loneliness can kill. You have to be careful "out there", but I know I'll never judge another for finding love where they can.
Rabbit's droppings . .. . ....