Was my entire life fake? (page 3)

justhuman

I ask my self the same question over and over again.....what I know for sure my life was based on a lie, created by some old fools and false prophets.

My existense was tied to a man made organization called the WT. My family, my relatives, my friends, they were all part of a play designed by a cult. After leaving WT (disfellowshiped for apostasy) all that I ever know collapsed. I spend 33 years of my life serving a cult made in US. I have sacrifice career,hobbies, talents in the altar of that cult. At the end I realize that I did not have any family, or friends. They were all fake

I do find the process of recovering and becoming again a normal person very hard. But I started to do things that I never did before,like attending to birthdays partys, wishing merry Christmas, Happy New Year, attending to a Church Ceremonies, praying to Jesus, I even start to have Holy Communion and asking from Jesus to come in my life and bring me peace of mind. I have no guilts, and I know I'm sinner that needs Jesus grace and forgiveness, and every time I ask Him to forgive me I know He does.

Like many of us in this forum, we feel the same... I do...but our life has just began. Now we have become alive and there is a hole new world to explore, and so much knowledge to get from this "wicked" world. You will realize after exiting WT that "its your life" and you are the one who are in control now. Now I have realize what Jesus meant the "truth shall set you free". We are free from fear, guilt, and all those cultic technics used by the WT. We have started to use our conscious and freedom of thought. And NO one will condemn me if I do not accept certain teachings, or if I believe that God did created this universe through an evolution process.

Welcome the real world, and in this forum through our personal expieriences we will help you if you ask it, to become again HUMAN

coolhandluke

Neo (the first time he returned to the Matrix): "I used to eat there. Really good noodles. I have these memories from my life. None of them happened. What does that mean?"
Trinity: "That the Matrix cannot tell you who you are."

You define your existence. You define the real, the not real, the pain, the joy... Im saying this to say that you are running into the wall that we all run into when the cognitive dissonance begins to shed its skin. The choice you are making in this case means that you are now the architect of your life. No one else. Congratulations. The pain will diminish with time.

worf

Bonafide,

I was also born into the jw organization. I was a third generation witness and also an elder.

The fact is that life as a JW is based on unrealities, wishful thinking and outright lies, all of these things falsely promoted by the watchtower society, which is nothing more than a publishing company masquerading as a religion. So in all honesty, life as a JW is in a way fake, because it is based on so-called prophecies, rules, and regulations, and promises, that have no basis in reality.

I understand the questions you are going through, because I, just as others here have gone through the same thing. I personally realized that I had been bamboozled by this organization all of my life after reading the chapter entitled: "Double Standards", in the book "Crisis Of Conscience" by Raymond Franz.

You should purchase "Crisis Of Conscience" and "In Search Of Christian Freedom", both by Raymond Franz if you haven't already done so. These 2 books will fully prove why the watchtower is a totally false organization, which was never backed by god, is not backed by god, and will never be backed by god. These 2 books will help you to sever your ties with the watchtower if thats what you really want to do.

Feel free to e-mail me through this board if you want to.

Worf

LockedChaos

Bonafide
Welcome

Your life was not fake.
Misdirected? Maybe.

Misled? Most certainly.

Reality can be harsh
when you become aware.

Don't let the past hinder
your future.

Continue to think and learn.
Consider all this time previous
to now as lessons in how to think
and learn. Now you will do it
on your terms.

Thoughts
We cannot overcome problems to survive unless we accept that "reality is real". That is, it is obective and exists independant of our thoughts or whims. To live man must understand this and obey reality. We must realize that it is not elastic and does not stretch to our fancies. A is A and an F on a test is still an F even if we hope otherwise.
Reality is that which exists. It is absolute.
It is the standard of the true, the false, and the arbitrary.
Reason is man's only means of knowing reality, upon which his survival in reality depends.

Feel free to question and act.

tresdecu

BonaFide

I am having the exact same feelings. I am right there with you!

Awakened at Gilead

Bonafide,

I sent you a PM... and I agree with Worf, you need to do the research on the org to deprogram...

--Fellow Former Indoctrinated member of JWs and Gilead Grad....A@G

BTW, if you use an alias and don't post anything too personal, you have nothing to fear posting on this site... I have my pic up, my real name up, and never have had a problem...

sacolton

Bonafide:

You absolutely must read Crisis of Conscience now!

bluesbreaker59

Bonafide,

Good luck with your journey, its a tough one. I was 3rd generation, born-in, I was "used" alot with "privileges", but I wasn't an elder or servant. I was also living a double life for about 11 of the 25 years I was a witness. Then I left last year in Jan. 2006, it was the best decision I ever made for my well being. I asked to be removed from the organization.

I did months and months of soul searching before coming to the decision that EVEN IF, they had the "truth" I didn't want it any more. THEN, I looked at some information online, like Six Screens of the Watchtower, lots of time spent looking up Charles T Russell and then finally got up the nerve to read "Crisis of Conscience". I learned that its just a very successful publishing company with many real estate holdings, that has lots of good intentioned people working FOR FREE so it can make more money. I don't blame the "rank and file", they are usually innocent victims, but I do try to enlighten the few that still speak to me.

Its tough with family and friends that are in though. Because you think they are "real" but they have been so conditioned by this cult that they WILL shun you, and will view you as a demon, if you speak your mind about the REAL TRUTH of this organization.

Eventually if you make friends "outside the Village" then you'll see they are your real friends, and you can have a very loving supportive group of friends that will stick by you no matter what your religious ideas are.

Turkey Sandwich

Comparing it to the Matrix is an interesting analogy I hadn't heard before. :)

digderidoo

Bonafide,

I feel for you.

You have done well it telling that sister what you really believe. Just stick around it sounds as though you are coming to terms with what the organisation has done to you. It's hard and it's a long journey.

But for me, after learning and scrutinising everything i have held dear i cannot go back to what is essentially a fake way of living.

In answer to your question though, was my entire life a fake?

I would say that i am now a product of my past (psychobabel i know). But living that way of life has made me the person i am today, so i have no regrets about that life. Essentially the whole of life for me is a learning experience. It will take time to come to terms with the JW life but stick around, we've all been there.

Paul

Was my entire life fake?

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