Never, Ever Believe A Thing They Tell You.

by Englishman 43 Replies latest jw friends

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  Englishman

  Do you know what really gets up my nose about all this?

  When I was a kid I was the apple of my grandparents eyes, there ain't nothing like a loving Grandma to make kids feel wanted!

  My son and daughter from my first marriage have missed out on that because BOTH sets of Grandparents have been JW's.

  My 3 sons from my second marriage have missed out because my parents were JW's and my wifes mother is as nutty as a fruitcake. So out of 4 sets of grandparents, my kids have seen 3 sets totally buggered up by the JW's.

  And then they say we ought to go back. NUTS!

  Englishman.

  Nostalgia isn't what it used to be....
• 

  Simon

  Yes, I have nice memories of visiting both sets of grandparents but our kids miss out to some extent because my dad lives in Canada and they have only seen him a few times (but they don't stop going on about him) and they only get to see Angharad's parents every few weeks 'cause they live in Wales.

  My mother and step-father don't see them and make no effort even though they only live 10 minutes away. Why? Because my brother in law wants to 'impress' as an elder and made it his mission to mess things up (because I have never fallen for his act and think he's a hypocrite). I know for a fact that he has been ringing her up telling her lies and the stupid woman falls for it.

  I just feel like going round and screaming at them sometimes it is so frustrating.

  The sad thing is that I'm at the stage now where I don't really care about them anymore. If they are willing to put rules laid down by uneducated morons above their own family then sod them! I don't think of them as family anymore and won't be bringing my kids up to - I don't want to put them through this "grandma loves you" / "grandma hates you" crap.
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  BluesBrother

  Sorry to hear your story - seems like a case of the rule book winning out over common sense, - I bet the relatives were got at ,"counselled" by the elders to apply the WT Rule and avoid your Ex and by implication, her family.. They would be too loyal to the org to admit that they were only doing it because they were told to do so.

  In fact a degree of flexibility can apply if the elders chose to show it/ I had a "sister" in my group once whose only daughter had been disfellowshipped. I turned a blind eye to her association with her, since the old lady was suffering depression already .

  By the way , the witneses only saw your kids as future disciples anyway - a lucky escape!
• 

  anglise

  Hi Eman

  another sad mad JW situation.
  I assume your children are not little ones and so are open to your reasoning about the true dub nature that is showing itself here.

  One thought that struck me was how this would be viewed in the light of the recent law passed in the UK on inciting religious and racial hatred or words to that effect?

  Maybe others have more info on this.

  Hope you can sort it without too much emotional fallout.
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  sunscapes

  It seems, like Joel's insightful post, that WE are fulfilling the prophecy that mentions that one following a righteous course will cause ones to lose their fathers, mothers, brothers, etc. How unfortunate, but accurate to say the least from what's written here.

  Englishman, "survey this table"!

  When we neither punish nor reproach evildoers ... we are ripping the foundations of justice from beneath future generations.
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  zanex

  this one's for you wiz...speaking as a df'd one for almost 5 years. My life has taken a total turn from when I was df'd and I am a good husband, father and a benefit to my commnunity but those jw's who I still have within my family circle, ie elder father, jw mother and jw sister, still treat me as a "stain" eventhough the events that led up to my df'ing are no longer existant. I fail to understand how the "shunning and exile" that those df'd have to go through is anything but humane punishment. That type of punishement is completely and totally uncalled for. I understand though that speaking as one of the borg u have little to no control over the mindless jargon that your kind spews out...I feel sorry for you...your post brought up some very old feelings of angst in me that I have struggled with for a long long time...
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  Englishman

  Anglise,

  Yes, my son and daughter are early 30's. My son was wise enough to see that a problem might re-appear, he's had childhood memories of JW umpetty-jumps. I spoke with my ex last night, she said that this had happened several times before, this time though she wasn't going to respond, she intends to simply write her story and the devil take the hindmost.

  Englishman.

  Nostalgia isn't what it used to be....
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  Pathofthorns

  One good thing i find is that many these days (at least in this area) seem to look down on those who shun family members.

  Many Witness parents have expressed to me that if their child were to be disfellowshipped they would still treat them the same (although they would be disappointed).

  The Society will have to out of necessity loosen their disfellowshipping policy rules. Young people completely disregard it, and the code of silence that lets them do what they want among their peers almost makes it a non-issue anyway.

  I think the issue deserves more publicity. It is an embarrassing and uncomfortable subject rarely discussed by JWs with the public. The Society can weasel-word their way around the matter, but they know it makes them look like a cult. (gee i wonder why?)

  The disfellowshipping policy is the sword by which they instill fear and punish their members. Take their evil sword away and many more will walk free.

  Path
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  Prisca

  Eman,

  Just want to express my amazement and anger at the cruel way your kids have been treated by their relatives. Even if they are in their 30s, it is a cruel thing to do to your own flesh and blood. I hope this shows lurkers just what kind of "love" the Jws have for non-JWs!
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  ozziepost

  Can you believe such audacity, instructing individuals who they can and cannot pray for.

  G'day H.S.,
  The above quoted point you make is very real to Mrs Ozzie and is the key issue that she "stumbled" on. It was the cause of her getting her eyes opened and learning the truth about the "troof".

  I guess some good did come out of it, eh?

  Cheers,
  Ozzie

  "It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."
  Anonymous