Post 1010 of 1010 since 12-Sep-03 Supreme One United Kingdom We often used to have other JWs to have a meal, at least once a month. Even those who had children. In 25 years probably count on one hand the number who ever invited us. Oh believe u me, everyone always raved about my ex-wife's cooking. She's Italian and would cook food for plenty of gatherings. It was never reciprocated with invites as well
Being new we invited 30 brothers over for dinner. We got an invite once?!
by Witness 007 34 Replies latest jw experiences
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willyloman
Of course, that was the late 70's, early 80's and I was out in around 81.
In the 1980's the WT Society put the kibosh on "large gatherings," as you may recall. This meant an end to talent shows, softball games, and other social events where the entire congo was invited to get together and have some fun.
That was the beginning of the end for the growth of the WT organization, in my view. The congregation we were in splintered into smaller social groups who tried to keep the "fun" (in dysfunctional?) going but this led to complaints of "cliques" and eventually a dub version of "don't ask don't tell" when it came to parties: You had them, you privately invited selected others, but you didn't broadcast it.
This is also about the time the Society began to warn the publishers, on a regular basis, that not everyone who showed up at the KH was really a brother/sister. This "warning" fostered suspicion and freed people to be discriminatory.
Looking back, this all probably stems from the shakeout in Bethel that came to a head in 1980-81 - about which Randy Watters has posted often (his freeminds.org site covers this exensively). The "us against them" cult mindset works best when "them" is limited to people on the outside; once "them" begins to be "us" these high control groups have problems sustaining themselves.
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slimboyfat
So what's the conclusion here folks? Apostates are social misfits?
Somebody must be getting invited somewhere.
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potleg
Years ago we inviter an elder and his family over for a meal and an evening together...not long after we finished eating he said they had to get going...there was a movie on tv that he wanted to watch. He had cable, we didn't. That guy was an a**hole, and probably still is CHUCK LEARNED.
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LongHairGal
Witness007,
I am sorry you found out the hard way that there are more takers than givers in the religion and in the world in general. Don't let that stop you from being the happy good person that you are. I am sure your generosity will be paid back to you in some way. While it is true that the people aren't as generous as you are, it is far worse that the friendships are conditional.
Shopaholic,
I can relate to what you said about not being invited because they were afraid you were after their mates. I also heard of secret mixed gatherings that I wasn't to because they didn't want any more competition around.
I have no patience for this anymore. They can keep their mind-games and head-trips.
LHG