by lola28 41 Replies latest jw friends
Like I said, I'm a cynic...
I look at things from that perspective, especially when it comes to anything JW.
Don't get me wrong, I think it's a very sincere and wonderful gesture, what you're doing. I wouldn't do it, but your generosity is probably greater than mine.
The fact that she's invited you to other social events is a good sign. I hope it works out that you can be friends and too much pressure to re-join the fold isn't put on you.
They say if you hang around the barbershop you will end up getting a haircut.
If you hang around a bar you will end up taking a drink.
They say dont play with fire.
You are trying to out manipulate master manipulaters.
Their tools are guilt, shame, confusion.
Have you considered getting Captives of a Concept and trying to teach HER a little bit about the Truth?
StAnn
What is so sad about this, is that the very community of JW's that she wants to bring you into is doing nothing for her -- nothing of practical value. Instead, she can only feel good about herself and ease her loneliness by spending time studying with you, and "counting her time".
Where is the love in the spiritual paradise?
I don't know whether you'd call it a study or not, but I had a JW coming over regularly. I think he tried to study the Live Forever book with me, but we both agreed it was remedial nonsense and I suggested tackling the Bible itself. We got into good discussions and never went back to that JW book.
Of course, I was just playing with him and was never / would never be lured into it.
But that's probably not the game lola wants to play with this woman. She wants to give her comfort, not put her under stress and challenge her beliefs. A challenge might drive her away from what might be the only person who's going to want to spend time with her.
Of course, we can't be too hasty in saying the congregation isn't helping. My dad's in his 80's and he's always telling me about people coming over to help him out, blow the snow after snow storms, bring them dinners, etc.
Sadly, even with meetings, JWs dropping by, and a 1-hour or so book-study, there are a lot of hours in the week where you're on your own. It can still be a lonely life.
lola, that's a very caring thought. Maybe you could slowly work other things into it. Sure, it may start with a book study, but maybe you can do something after that. Play games, have lunch, go shopping, or just talk. Maybe you can turn that into a regular activity and push out the book study. Even if you can't, that extra time with her may make the mind-numbing book study more palatable. Because you're going to come to dread that book study. And if that's all you do, you're going to come to dread seeing her to. So add more to it. So that when she comes, you can think about the other things you did together.
Lola, you must be a very kind and compassionate person. What a truly lovely, giving thought.
Perhaps you can gently turn the book study in another direction by bringing up other subjects of things the two of you could spend some time doing.
Maybe she can show you a crochet stitch or two.
Maybe when she comes, you can invite her into the kitchen (a different atmosphere) while you are putting together some recipe or baking bread, etc. and engage her to help you. Of course bake it while she's there and share!
Perhaps you can find something of interest outside.
I am not a JW but I am just thinking of ways I might try to change the subject of an unpleasant situation and at the same time share a happy time with someone.
I think being away from the "living room setting" would make for a less restrictive bible study encounter.
You're a much better person than I am... I don't think I could sit there and listen to someone drone on - reading from their little books... asking questions... *shaking head* nope... I don't think I could do it.
Unless... you're thinking that you'll invite her over to your home - bake her some cookies... mmmmm milk and cookies... then talk about things in general... hobbies... other things... not related to 'bible study'... clever.
deleted by me. for being mean
purps
I wonder if this is another trap. They will use these situations to get people to agree to a study. From there, they will start pushing you for boasting session attendance (which you must not start doing, because then everyone is going to start hounding you to make it regular). Past that, you will be hounded to join the Theocraptic Misery "School(??)". Then it's on to field circus, and they will start hounding you if you do not appear to be moving in that direction on your own. Usually, they will not waste their time on calls that just hang--and the hounders will start getting on their backs if they continue studying beyond that point and you are not moving ahead.
purplesofa, you mean? who would have thought.
