...Jehovah`s Witness`s have the most Stable Marriages...

by OUTLAW 69 Replies latest jw friends

  • Hiding Questioner
    Hiding Questioner

    My JW divorce was a soap opera. After what I thought was a happy 9 year witness marriage (my "best friend") my wife ambushes me in our home by secretly arranging her own version of a JC (her JW father and two elders) by getting them all to the house and then surprises the two elders and me by announcing (to my total surprise and shock) that I was unfaithful during one of my many business trips, which was not the case. To my dismay the elders felt that these accusations could be credible. Then, while on my next business trip, she took “my stuff” out of the house, changed the locks, filed for divorce and proceeded to slander my name and reputation throughout the community, all the while the local elders considered her “the victim” and “in good standing”. And, as this continued, I was applauded by the sheer number of JWs who believed her stories (people who knew me) and who allowed her stores to fuel their sick appetite for lurid stories of sexual escapades (including another false claim that I was gay).

    Now years later I am able to look back and I realize how unprepared as Jdubs we all are for marriage (most, like me, just winged it) and how vulnerable we all are to this sort of manipulation. In my case the whole “process” of our marriage was a deliberate attempt by my “wife” to use sex, my love and my commitment to our JW marriage to con me into giving her 50% access to all the wealth I had accumulated prior to our marriage, as well as that accumulated during the marriage, which I did and which was a tens of $1,000s of $$$ and in the end I felt like a victim of emotional and sexual abuse under the protective "eye" of the WBT$ and with the support (even encouragement) by many JWs, as h ow could I ever prove that I DID NOT have sex with another woman.

    Since then I have always maintained that, when it comes to marriage, the WTB$ is set up wrongly as a fear induced divorce prevention system of "governance" and not an organization that has a nurturing marriage maintenance "program" that enriches relationships by training us men to be good husbands and wives to be good wives.

  • Leprechaun
    Leprechaun

    Are you kidding me, JW's if the stay together they do so because of the power of cult! Not because they are happy by and large.

  • Leprechaun
    Leprechaun

    Are you kidding me, JW's if the stay together they do so because of the power of cult! Not because they are happy by and large.

  • steve2
    steve2

    There are two types of typically disastrous JW marriages:

    1) Those in which one of the spouses is a non-JW.

    2) Those in which both spouses are JWs.

  • Spook
    Spook

    None of those are true. There's a good stat analysis out there somewhere...can't remember the source. JW's are worse than some other religions, significantly worse than atheists or those with "no religion."

    I think a big problem with JW religions is that people never really date around when they are young. They don't learn how to have a healthy relationship. Then they think ridiculous things like praying or talking to the elders can solve legitimate problems.

    All in all, not a good setup.

  • llbh
    llbh

    The divorce rate in Canada is 60%.

    I did my own informal study of all the witness couples I have known well enough in my life (born in) to know their full marital history (how many marriages and divorces total). I started by listing all my immediate family, all my extended family and then all the people I had grown up with and kept in touch with enough to actually know whether they had divorced or stayed married. Guess what the divorce rate was? You guessed it! 60%! Don't JW's just hate to be so average!

  • truthsetsonefree
    truthsetsonefree

    Don't make me laugh! Goodness knows most JW couples I know are unhappy, staying together "for Jehovah".

  • Nostromo
    Nostromo

    I know a small congregation where 2 elders abandoned their wives and married another sister from the same congregation and this all happened within one year (all of them were disfellowshiped but reinstated few years later). Such great examples to the flock!

  • verystupid77
    verystupid77

    I truly loved my husband when we got married but he was also an elder. The religion came first. No matter what. I could have been bleeding to death and if the congo needed him he was gone. We are still married but I am bitter over it. When we were first married I went to the CO and talked to him about how hard I was finding it. His replay was my husband was an elder first.

    No they do not encourage happy marriages.

  • The-Borg
    The-Borg

    boy oh boy, the affairs, the blow jobs, the cocaine snorting, the unhappy marriages, the divorces, the tears and tantrums, the door slamming. I've seen it all. I even knew a brother who spent the night naked in a wardrode because the wifes elder husband came home early.

    Congregations sure are hotbeds of sexual tension.

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