by butalbee 43 Replies latest watchtower medical
depression can be a clinical medical condition, not a religious one.
mental illness is a medical condition not a JW thing. It's hereditary. It runs in families. It's been proven.
Funny how many people attribute things to as if it is a condition that ONLY affects or was created by JDubs.
JWs are just a scape-goat mechanisim for many.
Maybe people who become JDubs are predisoposed to depression/mental illnes and maybe there's the draw, but being a JDub is NOT the cause.
Erich--
If you are so happy as a witness, why are you posting under mental health and depression??
butalbee.
Everywhere depression is going on.. In the whole world !
I don't know any CO wherein less than 80% suffer under reactive depressions.
Me and my wife too. We suffered more than 10 yrs. During the last 5 years we
have learned to be not tooo serious. Now it's better. Think about Ps. 2:4 : "The very one sitting in the heaven will laugh; Jehovah himself will hold them in derision". So, I believe, it's much more better to see the current things with humor.
Do you want to know why I post in this forum at all?
In order to find at least 4 or 5 people, with whom I could discuss about things, that people elsewhere cannot understand.
Until this point in time, I did not find them yet.
I never felt helplessly doomed before studying JW. I used to be your ordinary rebellious catholic girl, and now all I can think about is the end of the world and me not being a perfect human,in the eyes of JEhovah. I'm sorry if I offended anyone, but my mind is just totally screwed up and I'm not sure if I can find an escape route. Sorry if I had offended you Erich, I'm just in alot of pain.
I ended things with my boyfriend, and I am trying to salvage my own beliefs in God and stop crying for longer than 5 minutes. The worse part of this is I will never find another soul mate, he was(and is) my only true love, whom I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, but I can't be a witness.
butalbee,
If you go to the top of the page to search, you can find a thread, "ten nutty beliefs." This may be of help to you. If you like it, would could post a comment to bring it back up to the most active list. Also, JoelBear started some good threads, but I can't remember the titles. Perhaps, he will show up and list them.
Just a short while ago, I was checking out some posts on an active JW board. The number of people there who were discussing their severe depressive symptoms...including suicidal thoughts...was amazing.
While it is true that depression frequently has a genetic base, there is also depression that results from being under constant stress and feeling helpless to do anything about it. I know....I've been there.
The only time in my life that I suffered depression and suicidal thoughts was when I was an active JW. I felt inadequate and helpless to do more. My health was horrible due to pushing myself way beyond my physical capabilities in an attempt to "measure up"....to "become worthy". But I never could, nor can any JW. No matter how much one does "in service to Jehovah", they are told that they should be doing more.
JWs are taught that any efforts toward personal betterment and accomplishment are futile and take away "glory from God". They are kept in a constant state of agitation...meetings, service, study....and any recreational activities that do not in some way involve some JW component are looked upon as time wasters. How can you consider doing such-and-such when the "End" is so close?
Talk about a breeding ground for depression!
Butalbee....I understand totally where you are coming from. You're taking the right steps. However, it might be good for you to consider seeing a counselor who is familiar with cult issues. You need to know that you are okay....you are not doomed, and you are not a failure. Association with JWs for any length of time can seriously screw up your self esteem.
Just wanted to add my .02
The Wiz says,
mental illness is a medical condition not a JW thing. It's hereditary. It runs in families. It's been proven.I agree for the most part. Mental Illness is certainly not something that is unique to JWs. It's like the question: Which came first, the chicken or the egg? I read a study somewhere, however, I cannot vouch for the integrity of it, that JW's have 7 times more mental illness than the general population in the US. However, the disclaimer at the end of the study also stated that they could not conclude whether or not people showed symtoms of mental illness because of being a JW or if individuals with a predisposition for mental illness were attracted to join the JW's. In my opinion, any high control cult could show similiar results.
As for depression being hereditary, that has NOT been proven. Not all that have depression in their genes become ill. Outside factors such as childhood trauma, living environment, and temperment also play a big roll. Someone can have no family history of depression and still be diagnosed with mental illness. I certainly think that the high stress life of being a JW can depress someone who might otherwise be fairly healthy emotionally.
I also think there is a difference in just how mental illness is handled by JWs in contrast to the rest population.
Here's an example to illustrate:
I have two cousins, both female, fairly close in age.
Cousin #1 Raised a JW from birth. Stable childhood and loving parents. Abet, a very devout JW Mother, however, Dad is JW also.
Did experience one very tramatic childhood event. Started showing symptoms of depression in her late teens. She knew something was wrong, but family kept repeating "nothing is wrong with you". Later when her behavior became more odd, she was told to "pray it away" or "go to more meetings". She became very wild and her behavior sometimes became frightening. She went through most of her twenties with her depression unabated. Finally, when her behavior became so bizarre and there was suicide attempts, she finally got help. Diagnoses: Bipolar Disorder. Today, she still struggles, but is getting therapy and taking meds to control her symptoms. She did attempt suicide again within the last year.
Cousin #2 Also a cousin to cousin #1. Parents were not JW's. Home was loving and stable. One childhood trauma. Became very depressed in her late teens, early twenties. At first, parents didn't react. However, her symptoms became worse. Parents immediately got help for her. Diagnoses: Bipolar Disorder. She currently is under the care of a therapist and takes no medications to control her manias. Finished college and is beginning to build a career.
What stands out to me is the glaring difference in how these two situations were handled. Cousin #1, the JW was left to flounder for years. There was the stigma her family wanted to avoid that possibly one of the "happiest people on earth" wasn't so happy. Wait on Jehovah to fix it. Where as Cousin #2 got help almost immediately. As a result, her outlook is bright.
Butalbee,
I know you are feeling very upset right now. I know what it's like feeling like you are toast in Jehovah's eyes. It's all a bunch of bull. And, all religion is man made. Yes, ALL. So, it's ok to feel sad that the man you want is just not to be. Many of us have been there. Not necessarily under the same circumstances, but knowing that even though our hearts want it, our heads know it's doomed. Please hang in there, and know that we care.
Andee
Thanks Andee!!!!!
My boyfriend called me up today and said that he is miserable without seeing me, he said he feels like he lost his best friend--he did--me. I know he called because he feels as lost as me without him, but it's not helping me to hear his voice, and it doesn't matter if we did try to work something out, I would be harassed to convert for the rest of my life with him. I miss him terribly though. I hope what I am doing is right.
Butalbee,
Wow what a heart-wrenching situation! Wishing the best for you. A couple thoughts.
Like my mom said (and maybe your mom too), in a situation where your heart is in a battle with your head, let the side with the "Brains" win. I noticed in your last post two phrases, one about your friend-- "he FEELS" - and one about you "I KNOW". Which should carry greater weight, the knowledge or the feeling? The answer is hard, but ....
My second thought is related to your last quote "I hope what I am doing is right." Last year I left the JW's, actually was forced out, and also lost my marriage (and have a beautiful 3 year old daughter) under a barrage of false accusations. It was SOOO hard to let go. The future is uncertain, but my hope for people like me and you (who have let our THOUGHTS win out over our feelings) is that we keep a positive attitude, keep working on our personality, and soon the love that we need will find its way into our life--- all in due time.
GopherWhy shouldn't truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense.
Mark Twain (1835-1910)
