I didn't want to hijack Billy X's attempt at hijacking another thread directed to our apostate terrorist, Reinna. This is a parady that only ex JW's could possibly appreciate. Whether you appreciate my macabre sense of humor is entirely another matter. I take on the form of Mrs Manners/Judith Martin for this. Enjoy! And excuse my mean sense of humor. I need an outlet......
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Kidnapping
Thank you for the article "Don’t Do Anything Stupid, or I’ll Kill You." (November 22, 1991) I too was a victim of a robbery in which I was held victim in my car. My abductor knew that I was one of Jehovah’s Witnesses because I constantly called Jehovah’s name out loud. Fortunately, I suffered no physical abuse other than swollen wrists from being tied up and a few scars from being thrown into the trunk. I remained calm and was able to dig my way out of the trunk through the backseat of my car. The incident and the trial made local news. My lawyer, neighbors, friends, and family gave credit to Jehovah for my escape. g92 5/8 p. 30 From Our Readers ***Dear Gentle Reader
We are glad you got out too. We are sure that the burglar wanted to get the hell away from you as well. Jail probably seemed like relief from the chirping you gave from the trunk. Having survived an in-car attack myself, I would suggest doing what I did, and kick the attacker in the nuts next time. You are allowed you know.
*** g92 11/8 p. 30 From Our Readers ***
Pit Bulls I was the owner of a pit bull, and she was the sweetest and most timid dog I ever owned. I was therefore offended by the title of the article "‘Devil Dogs’?" (May 22, 1992) This title gives the idea that all pit bulls are related to Satan and things that are evil. Simply owning a pit bull could now result in offending others. I agree, though, that people should take precautions if they are thinking of owning one. I would recommend that they get to know the background of the dog and its parents. Find out, too, if the dog has been well cared for. If so, it’s more likely to have a gentle disposition.
Dear Gentle Reader
I like you. You figured out that some nutty JW is going to run with this and create problems where no problems exist. I also like your idea of getting to know the dogs and their owners. You JW's should try that with "apostates". They too are treated like Pit Bulls, and are very misunderstood.
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Zulu Proverbs I am a 15-year-old girl who reads Awake! regularly and thinks it is super! I must say that your artists certainly know how to draw. When I saw the sketch of the funny-looking "cow" in the article "Zulu Proverbs" (March 8, 1992), I could not stop laughing. I do not understand why so many people refuse to read Awake!
Dear Gentle Reader,
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*** g92 10/8 p. 30 From Our Readers ***
Grandparents
I am eight years old and want to thank you for the article "Young People Ask . . . Why Did Our Grandparents Move In?" (July 8, 1992) Since Granny moved in, every time I practice my keyboard harmonica, Granny tells me I’m making a noisy racket. But she has also praised me sometimes, such as when I poured her a cup of tea and she said, "Thank you." When I read the article, I realized I do have to be kind to Granny after all.
Dear Gentle Reader
You are 8 years old and learning to play the harmonica. Parents all over the world hate you. Your Granny is right, all you are good for is tea delivery. Stop playing the harmonica, stay away from the drums and french trombone too. Try Soduku while humming. It's quieter.