JW Marraiges (page 2)

YoYoMama

paul: sorry about your marriage. Find comfort in the fact that she's better off without you.

NameWithheld

Stop being such an ass yoyodick. Ever heard of the term compassion? Look it up because they will never teach it to you at the local JW brainwashing sessions.

Yes, she can now devote 1500-1700 hours a year to books sales. Too bad when she's 60-70 years old the WTBTS retirment plan will kick in and when she's laying in a hospital bed the elders will tell her to find gov't aid to pay the bills.

I'd bet it's the other way around, and it's Paul whose better off without her.

YoYoMama

...And NameWithheld comes to the rescue. The defender of the poor...

I came to learn compassion from you.

Brymichmom

I was 18 years old when I got married in 1974. At that time, many of the JW's at the KH were saying that there might not be marriages in the "new system" and that if we were still single when armageddon came, that we would have to remain single for all eternity. I couldn't stand the idea of having to remain single forever and ever, after all being a teenager with raging hormones! So I married the first guy who showed interest in me, in fact he was still 17 when we married. I never did get to know him before getting married. What a mistake! He turned out to be physically abusive with me. When I told the elders what was happening, they told me that it was a "family problem" and that they could not get involved. They also said that I needed to stop "nagging" him, and that I was bringing this on myself. So there I was getting the crap beat out of me, and it was not a disfellowshipping offense for my husband! After going through this hell for 2 years, he was finally df'd for smoking. I think that is when my eyes began to be opened. How could it be ok to beat your wife, and physically abuse and hurt her, while it was not ok to smoke not hurting anyone else but maybe yourself? The whole thing was just disgusting!

I finally did leave that monster at that time. I had a baby that I did not want to put through growing up that way. If it had not been for my son being born (he is 25 now) I might now have seen the way clear to leave. I had to do what came instinctive--to take care of my child, no matter what the WT dictated.

What really used to burn me up was that I saw guys who were coming home from "Bethel" marrying 15 and 16 year old girls. They were in their early to mid 20's and they had to have a little 15 or 16 year old child to marry. These teenaged girls were so flattered, but I wonder how their marriages to these guys really turned out.

Mum

I was the only JW in my family. I was living in a slum apartment because I did not enjoy living with my family, to put it mildly.

Anyway, I was very lonely and vulnerable as well as not terribly desirable, what with not having a family "in the truth" and not being terribly physically attractive and being naturally withdrawn and shy.

I knew I had nothing in common with the man I married. I knew that I did not love him. However, I had been madly in love with a "worldly" person and was getting over it as best I could; so I figured this poor JW schmuck was "Jehovah's provision" to help me escape the life of hopelessness I was living.

Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix

paulvarjak

Ah yoyo,

Such an example. I'm sure she is better off without me in her mind and in the JW alternate reality. It proves how conditional love is to the JW's.

The foremost thing that I've learned in my years away from the YoYo's is unconditional love - both giving and recieving.

Cheers - paul

ps. Yoyo, I hope you find it one day.

JBean

Amen Paul! Folks like YoYo are so nasty because they are stifled and extremely angry and they don't even know it... Obviously this board welcomes all.. JW and non-JW, but if someone is here to try to slam those that have left or convert them back... they should be ashamed of themselves. They aren't even supposed to be here... so they're the hypocrites, not anyone else. I'd like to see what kind of reception they'd receive back at their KH if they stated to the congregation "... oh, when I was chatting on the apostate board..." Anyhow... back to the thread. I got married at 18 to a fellow JW during a year that EVERY 17 - 20 year old in our hall got married. Throughout the years, EVERY SINGLE COUPLE (including myself) got divorced. That is a sad thing because there were some really nice young people that became emotionally wrecked 'cos of this. I also believe that they all had numerous children from these marriages...here I did not follow suit. I still don't have kids... yet! : ) Jbean

NameWithheld

Isn't that funny JBean, how it seems that that trend is universal in the JW's - once the youth marraiges start ALL the kids of eligible age get married. Seen it a bunch of times.

JBean

I also just remembered something: when I was 16 I wanted to "go out" with a boy in one of my classes. We like each other A LOT and I actually had the nerve : ) to ask my parents if we could go out to dinner or something one night. My folks sat me down and explained to me that I needed to find a brother in the "truth". Period. Obviously I didn't get to date this guy in school... but I remember telling one of the girls in my class that it was probably for the best and that I was very happy to have such a "brotherhood" to choose from... that if I had my pick of all the guys in the whole world, I would feel very unsafe and who knows what type of guy I might end up with!!! The guys in the truth were so righteous, loving and kind that I couldn't find a better "picking pool". HOW SICK WAS I?!?!?!? My personal experiences blow that theory right out of the water! And someone mentioned that they were free to marry out of love (or tell their kids to marry out of love)... how true. I don't think most of these witness kids know what love even is yet when they choose their mate! I know I didn't. The marriages that have lasted in or out of the organzation are truly blessed.

ballistic

I wonder what the actual statistics are for JW marriage success rates. Take a random sample (my family) ... 3 witness marriages failed out of 3.

JW Marraiges

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