I would like to know if you have succeeded in helping your friends or family SLOW DOWN in their zeal as a JW

by BonaFide 22 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  BonaFide

  I have read thousands of posts on this forum, and I am finding with all your experiences that however hard we try, it's difficult to actually get a family member or friend to disassociate themselves. After all, some of us are still "active JW's", right?

  BUT, I have been noticing that some seem to have accomplished enough with questions and comments that at least their family members or friends ARE LESS ACTIVE AS JW'S.

  So, how many of you have been PARTIALLY SUCCESSFUL in helping someone to be at least less zealous as a Witness, or to doubt the elders' absolute authority? Have you helped someone to be more critical in their thinking? Or to reason more about some of the teachings?

  Seems to me with a couple of friends I have, that after some of these conversations about how many billions haven't been reached yet, and how the elders' make mistakes, and how the teaching's change, they are not quite as zealous as they were. One of them told me he "took a day off" last weekend instead of going to the meeting.

  Could this be the way to bring the Organization down, little by little, brick by brick, doctrine by doctrine?

  Experiences and comments and criticism welcome.

  BF
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  flipper

  BONAFIDE- Although I haven't succeeded yet , and I emphasize YET - in helping my older daughter slow down , I did however in early 2008 help my 33 year old JW niece who has 2 young children think seriously about the child abuse scandal that happened in the witnesses. Of course she had heard nothing about it - like most of them - but when I told her that victims and family were discouraged from reporting child abuse to the police and told to just report it to elders she stated, " If I ever hear of children being abused in my congregation I will go DIRECTLY to the police NOT the elders ! " I was so proud of my niece - it gave me a Kodak moment !

  So explaining the faulty policies helped her to see the need to authentically keep her eyes out herself in her home congregation . Interestingly enough this particular niece values family over the organization as she only attends about half the meetings. She is less cult controlled than some of my witness relatives , and more reality controlled which is good
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  asilentone

  nope! My family are very diehard JW's. I do not want to try to influence my JW friends or they might turn me in for apostasy. I have never even try that on my family because I want to keep in touch with them. It would not surprise me if you Bona Fide will be exposed one day. Good Luck!
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  boyzone

  Hi BF

  Its been a slow process but one success with my JW mum has been in her thinking. She has seen how the shunning has affected me and her 9 year old grandson and its made her alot less defensive of the local Witnesses. She's also much quicker in finding an excuse not to get to meetings too. If any of the family happen to be visiting, the meeting is the last place you'll find her. Dad tries to keep her on the straight and narrow but she's a strong lady whose recently fought cancer and I think she's realised just how precious her family is to her and she's not going to let the Org get in the way of our relationship. I'll always be grateful for that.

  So, even though the shunning has been tough, its been worth it to see my mum slow down.

  I'd also like to encourage you to keep doing what you're doing. Don't get put off by the seeming lack of immediate results, you can't rush these things. You're planting seeds of doubt and thats important. When those seeds germinate it'll be you that'll be the most approachable to ask further questions of and you they'll feel safe with.

  First of all though, are YOU convinced its not the truth? How do YOU feel about the Organization? How has this affected your faith or belief in the bible? Do you understand that Jesus brought freedom from rules and do you want this for yourself and your friends? If your not sure, read Galatians,

  Once you work out where your head is in all of this for yourself, then you're in a better place to help others. But look after yourself first!

  love BZ
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  OUTLAW

  Bonifide..Stop worrying about,Bringing the WBT$ Down!!..That is a wasted effort!!!.. We need to show EX-Jw` how to find a new life.. .............OUTLAW
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  passwordprotected

  My family don't talk to me about anything relating to the WTS these days (we decided on a truce a couple of months ago). However, that doesn't stop us hearing things on the grapevine, or being aware of their level of WTS activity.

  I'd say that on both sides of my family (by that I include my in-laws) there's been a degree of tailing off in the past 6 months.
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  The-Borg

  I got my wife out and I directly helped a friend leave. I also indirectly helped 2 others, one of whom also helped me. I think I've also convinced my dis-fellowshipped sister in law never to go back, although the local congregation has already done a really good job of alienating her. I just delivered the coup de grace. I know one I have helped has also helped others out and so on.

  The problem the organisation has is their own idiotic policies. They have a large number of resentful people trapped in congregations who are unable to leave. Like a cancer they eat away at the other members. Lets just hope it's terminal.
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  quietlyleaving

  The problem the organisation has is their own idiotic policies. They have a large number of resentful people trapped in congregations who are unable to leave. Like a cancer they eat away at the other members. Lets just hope it's terminal.

  yup. Its a lot easier nowadays to get people thinking and sometimes just by one's presence.

  The resentfulness is terminal imo.
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  blondie

  I have found it only really works with people who have already had a personal moment of revelation, finally putting the pieces together that they have seen themselves. Once there is that crack, they see more clearly. That's what happened to me, a quiet invitation to prove some point to myself which lead to my seeing that the bible did not support it, on top of this was reading the older publications and seeing what the WTS had left out of the Proclaimers book or had twisted.
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  wannaexit

  I agree with Blondie that it only works with people that already have a few cracks in their armour. Hubby however, as been successful with one family that has completed left. and together we have helped a good friend who also took "french leave" as we say in Canada.

  For the most part, trying to educate someone has always landed me in the back room of the hall