lola28
While I, to a point, understand your position about not being governed by bitterness, and accepting that we can't change everyone's behaviour, I respectfully want to say that taking your position (as it is) isn't helpful at all. Just give up on what are the closest relationships we have had?
I'm a "fader" (a horrible failure at this too, since I'm still showing up sporadically at the hall). You're apparently a more successful fader, but maybe you weren't as close to the jws, as many of us were. Its difficult to accept having intimate relationships cut off, not because we mistreated the others or were "bitches of the block" or "jerks" but only because we no longer believe the same things. Yes, we've got to move away from them if that side repeatedly makes it known that they want nothing to do with us. We need that time to grieve that loss then first. In that first stage of grieving, why not see if we can affect just the individuals closest to us, by letting them know how upsetting it is to us to lose them in our lives?