My response is Hell No too! But until 6mths ago, it wouldn't have been. I thought I married a good Jw husband but he was flakey, emotionally abusive and just plain lazy! All things a person can do without. I'm fading now, and have NO intention of ever getting involved with a Jw in the future.
Are Jehovah's Witness men good catches?
by garyneal 77 Replies latest social relationships
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garyneal
KidKool:
Well, my wife and I both agreed that my sister-in-laws ex-boyfriend (baby's daddy) was in no way a 'good catch.' Frankly, we could not even understand why she bothered with him to start with.
Still though I could not understand why my wife felt the same way she did concerning a JW man. I wasn't like that at all and of course I was not perfect but I figured that in all fairness, she could've gotten much worse. And yes, I could have gotten much worse also. But then again, I don't see where things were so bad between us.
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garyneal
wantstoleave:
I can understand your feelings. During our darkest years I can remember too feeling that if this is what being in the 'truth' teaches, I wanted no part of it.
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yknot
So my question to the ladies is this: Have you while you were still in (or those who are currently still in) thought that the best thing that would've happened to you was for you to hitch up with a JW man? For those who married 'worldly' men, did you secretly wish he could become a Jehovah's Witness man? Or when things weren't going well in your marraige to your 'worldly' man, did you believe that things would've been better had you have married a Jehovah's Witness man?
Never personally met a JW man who was compatible to my personality on that level.
Sure there were many times I paid a piper for marrying a worldly man, thinking if he only accepted the Truth his shortcoming would be ironed out.
I wished a time or two for his conversion but Satan has a better chance of gaining salvation than him converting.
I never entertained the 'what ifs' because I feel that is disloyal to my marriage and I take marriage very seriously.
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garyneal
I never entertained the 'what ifs' because I feel that is disloyal to my marriage and I take marriage very seriously.
Very commendable, I certainly wish I could've been like that but alas I wasn't. I certainly believe that Christ can change us from the inside out but I know that this is a change that someone must want. Apparently, I did not feel the need to change myself until this past summer.
Concerning my wife, as funny as it may sound, there are times when I too thought that if she only accepted the 'truth' then her shortcomings would be ironed out. But we all have shortcomings and my wife certainly reminds me of mine.
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garyneal
You know, gang, I think what I find so perplexing is how my wife, her sister, and her cousin are in regards to who they date (and marry).
My wife marries a 'worldly' man.
Her sister has only been dating 'worldly' men.
Her cousin is in a relationship with a 'worldly' man.
I told my wife and her sister one time that they are not doing any favors to the 'worldly' men by dating them and marrying them if they insist on continuing to be witnesses. Her cousin, by the way, is baptized while my wife and her sister are not.
Since my wife and I are married, our relationship is what it is for better or for worse, but for the others, I think they should cut their 'worldly' men loose and keep their Jehovah's Witness ways 'in the (spiritual) family' and seek only witnesses.
So I have another question, why do Jehovah's Witnesses bother dating worldly people to start with?
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yknot
The great man shortage.....
This is why there are more JWgals married to non-JW men.
JW men might become 'experienced' with non-JW gals but they know if they plan on staying active dubbies they are going to have to marry a nice JWgirl and they have plenty to choose from......
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garyneal
The great man shortage..... Curious, it makes me wonder why the Society struggles to recruit or keep more men in their flock.
I've heard that as a whole, women tend to be more religious than men. However, it would seem that the man shortage amongst the Jehovah's Witnesses are more acute. Or perhaps I am just generalizing....
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yknot
The great man shortage started before I was born (73').
I am not sure if women are more religious or more prone to 'following' in paternal societies.
Either way the WTS is facing growing losses among their male members due to many many things........namely time marching onward, internet and them losing credibility in the wake of it all.
That said when I think about my congregation the Elders that do all the 'leading' are those that converted......only 2 elders are born/raised.
The JW male is taught to suppress a certain assertiveness that is born to all men in their coming of age. That assertiveness is naturally attractive to women.
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creativhoney
on the opposite side I think its really unfair to embark on a relationship with a 'worldly' while you are out with the intention of going back once you 'marry them' - I know people who do that, and its just like you then become a different person to the one they met.
JW men cant just be defined. people are people. some are sincere, some are arseholes. though on the assertive topic, I never found a JW man I couldnt shoot down, so assertiveness I didnt see.? I found most of them wet, insipid and not at all attractive, especially the idea that if you got them in the sack they would think everything was a sin. what a turn off.