I would like to say I appreciate the many remarks and reads given this topic. All good advice and observations coming from many different perspectives, is that not what a discussion board is all about? My purpose in posting the letters from my parents is to help many see that they are not alone and from the replies, many have basically the same response from their JW parents. It helps you to think about your response to those within this religion and be better prepared when a letter such as this arrives in the mail. This is a very personal part of my life yet I feel it is one that should be shared as I think the help and understanding of the dynamics at play here can help the many others who deal and are yet to deal with this situation in their family.
I went to my parents in the fall of 2000 and explained the issue at stake with WT policy and told them if their was no effort by the Society to do the right thing I was going to have to stand up. I will never forget being told by my mother I had their complete support. That ended when I resigned as elder though I told them I was going to do so.
It is a long sad story, yet the point is how quickly you go from hero to 0 in the JW mindset.
I remember my grandparents they were always so kind and loving. I never doubted for a minute that they loved me, wanted to be part of my life and now that they are gone I wish so much that my children could have known them. They were never JW’s. My children have not seen their grandparents in a year and frankly did not see them much before that. I feel the loss for my children I know what it is like to have loving grandparents.
I hope this thread will make others think about what cult mind control does to families and how it justifies their actions. I hope it can help many others see they are not alone we all have to deal with this problem when we learn to be clear thinkers. I do not defend the letter I wrote as I mentioned I spoke from my heart, it is how I feel is the best way to address the situation I am in. Your situation may be different which would call for a totally different response that is your personal decision. The older I get in life the more unsure I have become of anything being absolutely the right thing to do. If you agree with my letter, fine if not that is fine to, at least it made the reader think about their response when faced with a similar situation. If this thread helped you good! If it made you mad, that is good to, as it motivated you to think and speak out about how you feel. That can be better than holding things in.
I think of the saying, “If everybody likes you it means you are doing nothing.” I doubt that saying will ever be said about me.