If you discover, while getting to know a potential partner, that they have cheated on a previous partner........ don't touch them. Run run run.
In my opinion a cheat remains a cheat. Opportunity is the variable.
Please discuss.
Once a cheater, always a cheater
by Quillsky 53 Replies latest jw friends
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jehovahsheep
i think people can change if they want to-like myself.over 50 % of men have cheated the experts claim.
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yknot
Cheating isn't alway a clear cut thing........
Many on this board have done so to 'release' their spouses who remain JWs.
Some fall into cheating after years of neglect and abuse by a treat'em mean to keep her keen Elder husbands
Some make a mistake and take for granted their relationship out of misguided selfishness.
Some are just 'immature'
and yes some are jackasses who date others as a way to pass the time until mr/mrs right comes along finally.
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vivalavida
I definitely do not believe it. Humans and human nature is not set on stone, they are constantly evolving and changing. Yes, sometimes the change is negative but a lot of times it can be defined as improvement.
I'd more likely agree with the contention that it depends on a series of factors, like opportunity, status of the relationship, commitment and personality. Hey, some people cannot stop themselves from eating that chocolate on the table, others, on the other hand, definitely can.
I believe that judging a person for whatever they did in the past, without giving an opportunity to show what they are made out of _now_, is like a form of prejudice, isn't it? Of course, this doesn't mean that one needs to go blindly at it. There are indeed cheaters that remain always cheaters.
Just my 2 cents
Vivalavida
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paul from cleveland
I hope that's not true. Once you've experienced the guilt and pain of cheating isn't it possible to learn from your mistakes?
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Aussie Oz
I went to a couple of strip clubs before leaving my wife. To some i guess thats cheating.
However, after i left my wife, i stayed away from other women until i knew i would not return even though i had opportunity and desire and it was two years before i had sex with another to free her to remarry.
Was that cheating?
It destroyed me totally for a long time. After that i had two longer term relationships and was 100% faithful. I have been in the situation of meeting 3 very nice women within the space of two weeks and i could not date more than one... Even though at that stage it would hardly be cheating on one or the other, could'nt do it.
Have been with my new wife for a bit over 3 years, never tempted to stray, and if i want to go to strip clubs she comes along too.
I dont consider myself a cheater ever though others may disagree, and as others have said, reasons for it can vary greatly. I don't beleive once a cheater always a cheater either. Reasons must be considered.
oz
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Quillsky
Interesting how most cheaters are justifying cheating.
Any non-cheaters willing to step up?
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Aussie Oz
Quillsky, i think you have an agenda.
Interesting how people judge others without having walked in their shoes too.
You asked for a discussion then shoot those brave enough to share?
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Broken Promises
I’ve been cheated on and I’ve also been the “other woman”.
Cheaters cheat because of opportunity, desire, boredom etc etc.
Would a cheater cheat again if given the opportunity? Possibly, but I don’t think there’s any hard and fast rule.
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MMXIV
According to Matthew 5:28 I cheated on five girls at just one assembly - but have never actually cheated.
MMXIV