Turning in time?

by crazy2try 42 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  OnTheWayOut

  We haven't been to a meeting in over 6 months.

  To expect "time" in such a situation is ridiculous. The fade reaches a point where it works or it doesn't. The whole idea of a fade is not to lie to family, but to withhold some feelings/information in order for them to keep speaking to you. (You are not DA'ed or DF'ed so they don't need to shun you.) Blondie is right: Just tell them you have no time to turn in and if you filled out those forms you would be lying and they certainly don't want you to lie...........

  This shows where people's cult training takes them. It is more important to have your field recruiting time than to actually get you back. Even if a person in such a situation as missing meetings constantly for 6 months still wanted to be a JW, it would be wrong to expect recruiting time from them.

  You have to tell the in-laws something. Do as Blondie suggested. If it breaks down into an argument, offer little. "We are on a break from meetings AND service." Or whatever you have been telling them already.
• 

  dgp

  Marked
• 

  ana_dote

  Teel and blondie both had good suggestions. I have been "inactive" at different points throughout the last 8 years and honestly, the elders never hounded me too much about time reports. I might get the RARE call from an elder just trying to make sure he gets his quota of turned in slips, but as with those suggestions, I would just say I didn't have any time for the month. Usually, they would just say "ok" and leave me alone. LOL I guess it depends on how aggressive your congregation/family are about it. I've always been looked over in the congregations, so it was never more than the occassional call every couple months tops.

  I think the MOST retarded thing that happened to me is when I had moved in with my parents for a while, thus switching congregations (including having my publisher card transferred), and every month or so (or purely on the visit of the C.O.) an elder from my OLD congregation would call to "encourage" me to come to meetings....as tho I had simply just stopped going. THAT was dumb. The last time it happened, the stupid elder had the nerve to actually PUT ME ON THE PHONE WITH THE C.O. Even AFTER I had reminded him that I was living with my parents (both active witnesses) AND attending a new hall AND already had my card transferred for months already. He just ignored what I said and put the CO on the phone, who also tried to encourage me to come to THEIR meeting. What made it even more stupid is that my parents' congregation was having the CO the following week (we were in a different circuit)...and when I told the CO on the phone that, not only did he STILL try to get me to commit to coming to HIS "special sunday talk", but he also asked WHO the CO was in my new congregation, as though I were lying or something!!! Fortunately I DID remember the CO's name (he was a new one) and he actually knew and had worked with this person in the past. But when all was said and done, he still was trying to get me to come to their meetings. WASN'T IT ENOUGH that I was attending (at the time) WITH my family???? Apparently they were just concerned with owning me as a publisher, even though their records no longer had me as being THERE.

  Wow...sorry, I guess I got off on a tangent there LOL

  Bottom line, I'd say either a) don't turn any time in at all and just see what happens, as chances are they might not be very aggressive OR b) turn in a time slip with a big fat 0 on it, like a few of us have done on several occassions. Turning in even an empty slip gets them off your back about "reporting" because you DID turn something in. But depending on the aggressiveness of your body of elders, you can possibly just get away with doing nothing, like I did.

  :-)
• 

  keyser soze

  What OTWO said. If you haven't been to a meeting in over six months, why would anyone expect a time slip from you? Why would anyone believe that you actually had any time to turn in?
• 

  its_me!

  Honestly, I just stopped. I was just a measly woman, and had no husband to lure them to care about me. So, I didn't turn it in, and they never asked. Then I just started coming to less and less meetings. No one cared, and honestly, I wanted it that way! It confirmed everything that I had ever thought about them!
• 

  jordan12

  Ad hominem isn't necessary in order to make a point. I know it is the Watchtower way but get over that please if you want to have productive conversations here.

  You don't know what an ad hominem is. Ad hominem means saying that an argument is invalid because of who makes it. As for productive conversations here, I've already seen what sort of a place this is. I'm not stupid.

  As for the implication that fading is dishonest, Theocratic Warfare Strategy teaches us that some people do not deserve the truth and that it is perfectly ok to lie to them to protect the spirituality of ourselves and others.

  So it's OK to do it because you thing the Watch Tower does it? That's a bizarre and contradictory argument from someone who rejects Jehovah's Witnesses' teachings as a moral authority.

  You are also misrepresenting what The Watchtower has said about Theocratic War strategy.

  Fading does that.

  Fading is for people who don't have the courage of their own convictions. Jehovah's Witnesses have endured all sorts of persecution rather than deny who they are and what they believe in. That's real courage and real honesty I would say.

  Many stay in the borg because of the threat of shunning by family and friends and with the hope of enlightening others to the truth.

  I'm sorry but I don't know what the "borg" is. You are so brainwashed by boards like this that you can't even use proper terminology. As for "enlightening others to the truth", well I've never seen so many lies in one place as I have on this board.

  The victims of the cult have been lied to for almost a century and a half and indoctrinated to avoid and shun the blunt honesty your post would seem

  to recommend. Fudging a time sheet (which rank and file Dubs already do all the time) isn't an unforgivable sin when the intention is fading and

  helping others escape the borg.

  First of all, what's with the "dubs" thing? Can't you use a respectful term? You would complain enough if Witnesses used a disrespectful term to refer to you. Two sets of weights?

  Secondly, how exactly do you know that rank and file Witnesses "fudge" their reports?

  Hey 5th generation, what sort of problems happened by continuing to report the family study? I'm at this point, too, and would like to know what to expect. Thanks.

  Quit the lies and the double life and tell the congregation the truth. Go on, be a man!
• 

  Mad Sweeney

  You don't know what an ad hominem is. Ad hominem means saying that an argument is invalid because of who makes it. As for productive conversations here, I've already seen what sort of a place this is. I'm not stupid.

  LoL. Ad hominem is Latin for "toward the person" or "against the person" and is used to describe a response that attacks the person rather than the person's point, which is what you did. But you're not stupid. Sure.

  So it's OK to do it because you thing the Watch Tower does it? That's a bizarre and contradictory argument from someone who rejects Jehovah's Witnesses' teachings as a moral authority.

  You are also misrepresenting what The Watchtower has said about Theocratic War strategy.

  I didn't say it's ok to do it because the Watch Tower does it. And if I'm wrong about Theocratic War strategy and lying, please correct me. I'm only a lifelong Dub so what do I know about it?

  Fading is for people who don't have the courage of their own convictions. Jehovah's Witnesses have endured all sorts of persecution rather than deny who they are and what they believe in. That's real courage and real honesty I would say.

  So they're courageous victims of cult mind control. I guess that's something to be proud of.

  I'm sorry but I don't know what the "borg" is. You are so brainwashed by boards like this that you can't even use proper terminology. As for "enlightening others to the truth", well I've never seen so many lies in one place as I have on this board.

  Have you seen too many lies to point out a few? Go ahead, join the discussion. If you're so solid in your righteousness, go for it. Show us that JW courage you're so proud of and point out some falsehoods. Speaking of lying, I don't believe that you don't know what the "borg" is. Pot, meet kettle.

  First of all, what's with the "dubs" thing? Can't you use a respectful term? You would complain enough if Witnesses used a disrespectful term to refer to you. Two sets of weights?

  Secondly, how exactly do you know that rank and file Witnesses "fudge" their reports?

  First, I AM A DUB myself, so get off the high horse and quit taking offense with a little nickname.

  Second, I've been A DUB for a LONG time. I know how folks operate.

  This board welcomes people like yourself. I welcome you. I hope you are willing to show enough intellectual honesty to actually engage in discussions and not troll or sabotage threads.
• 

  palmtree67

  jordan12 = recently welcomed to the board, now randomly attacking the board.

  ?????
• 

  jordan12

  jordan12 = recently welcomed to the board, now randomly attacking the board.

  ?????

  Some people don't like being disagreed with, do they?

  What are you going to do, disfellowship me?
• 

  jordan12

  LoL. Ad hominem is Latin for "toward the person" or "against the person" and is used to describe a response that attacks the person rather than the person's point, which is what you did. But you're not stupid. Sure.

  It matters little what it means in Latin. When someone encourages others to lie, that inevitably tells you something about his trustworthiness. Pointing that out is not an ad hominem.

  Furthermore, I didn't attack the person's point. How could I? He didn't make a point. He simply made a recommendation (that someone else should act deceitfully). Someone with that standard of honesty is likely to lie about other things. That is all I said and it is a perfectly valid inference.

  I didn't say it's ok to do it because the Watch Tower does it.

  So why bring up Theocratic War strategy then? Most Witnesses have never even heard of it. And yes, I've read the articles from 50 years ago, saying that you don't have to hand your brothers over the the Gestapo or the KGB. Big deal. You make it look as if Witnesses lie all the time in quite trivial things to promote their religion. That is false. But since you apparently approve of lying, I don't expect you to acknowledge that.

  So they're courageous victims of cult mind control. I guess that's something to be proud of.

  Pure rhetoric, sarcasm and nothing else. It takes very little intelligence to be sarcastic.

  This is the sort of stuff that people on this board get used to taking for granted because no-one ever questions it.

  People become Jehovah's Witnesses because they study the teachings, believe them and decide to join. No-one makes them join and no-one stops them from leaving. "Cult mind control" is a fantasy accepted by hardly anyone except ex-members of religious groups trying to justify their former religious affiliations.

  Have you seen too many lies to point out a few? Go ahead, join the discussion.

  I already have, in other threads.

  Here are some lies: "Jehovah's Witnesses don't acknowledge that rape is a violent crime" (http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/189257/1/jw-blamed-her-daughter-when-grandaughter-was-raped);

  "Former/Active District Overseer Arrested for Child Porn" (http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/scandals/189875/1/Former-Active-District-Overseer-Arrested-For-Child-Porn-on-Laptop-In-The-UK);

  "you can get df'd for masochism but not for beating your wife and children" (http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/190879/1/Disfellowshipped-for-masochism);

  JW man circumcised son at home (http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/190870/1/One-year-in-jail-for-JW-man-who-circumcised-son-at-home)

  Speaking of lying, I don't believe that you don't know what the "borg" is. Pot, meet kettle.

  I think you are intelligent enough to recognise when someone is using a figure of speech.

  First, I AM A DUB myself, so get off the high horse and quit taking offense with a little nickname.
  Second, I've been A DUB for a LONG time. I know how folks operate.

  It's not just a nickname; it's a term of contempt. You aren't capable of respectful discussion; you are a ridiculer, pure and simple. It's pathetic.

  And there is no way you can possibly have any idea what millions of Witnesses put on their reports. You're slandering a whole group of people without any proof at all ("I know" is not proof) just so you can defend the indefensible: a poster here encouraging others to tell bare-faced lies.

  What I have learned from your thread, by your own admission, is this: it's perfectly OK to tell people lies and call them names.