Welcome!! Glad your here. I hope the healing starts soon for you!! I really have no advice to give. I was one of those who was born in but hated it and didn't beileve, but got baptized becuase I was to old not to be and, people asked me when I was getting baptized a lot. When I left I had a few hard months but it went away because I had a really good friend who helped me start to learn to be normal. I hope you find the same thing here.
Brand New: Currently Totally Devastated
by daringhart13 78 Replies latest jw friends
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dissed
My experience was very similar to yours. If more people knew what went on behind closed doors, they would be shocked.
When in, I honestly felt some Elders didn't really believe in JG, by the way they talked about and treated others.
Coming to this site has opened my eyes to all sorts of JW misgivings. Try looking at the 'Search' function on past threads. I found it hard to not stop looking, as EACH day I found some incredible and accurate info on the WT, which will also prove conclusively, they do not have JG HS.
You have really, just begun your search.........
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BabaYaga
Welcome!
You'll just have to trust me on this... it gets better and easier. We're very glad you're here.
Love,
Baba. -
Scott77
Hi Darlinghart,
Welcome. As an Ex-Elder, you are certainly a big fish kind of. Please, be careful not to disclose all identifying information when you share experiences with us. Please, read the forum policies to help in this. We love you very much and understandably,its a very painful and emotional time for you at this stage of coming out. Please, be assured, Ex-elders on this JWN site will be able to provide much needed encouragement and support every step of the way.
Best wishes
Scott77
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JWdaughter
Welcome! We are probably just what you need right now. Blondie and terry are great ones to pay attention to-for different reasons. They both have common sense. Terry is a little more abrupt about it:) Enjoy your soujourn with us.
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AllTimeJeff
Hi there and welcome! I am a former elder and Gilead grad. I totally understand where you are coming from. Elders who leave because of a lack of love, to me, they are among my favorites to read, because you have a moral imperative behind what you say and write....
First of all, it does get better. I won't lie and say that in two weeks, or a month, it will all be ok. You have many decisions to make over time. (no rush on that btw) The best, happiest thing for you right now is that you can take the lid off your head. Read, be open minded to both viewpoints and people, and give yourself some time to let it all in. Or out.
As an elder, in my congregation, we were politically correct, so we didn't openly disparage our flock, even at elders meetings. Occasionally, we all would make comments about certain ones who ticked us off. Thats just how it worked. As an elder, I saw mental illness on a scale I could scarcely have anticipated. The JW people are by and large, a nice group of dedicated, misled people. They need real care, but are denied this by amateur's masquerading as elders, spiritual leaders who can't find there way out of a paper bag. The only real requirement at the end of the day to be and stay an elder is to back up all GB directives with 100% enthusiasm.
I am guessing that is why there is an elder shortage right now.
Anyway, welcome! I read you are getting some therapy. (did I read that right?) If so, that is well worth the time, and I wish you all the best as you break free from the sickness that you were in.
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Mad Sweeney
I am guessing that is why there is an elder shortage right now.
Few who would be remotely qualified would be interested in the position. In my most recent congregation there is only one elder out of the 5 or 6 that isn't a complete doofus.
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zoiks
Welcome to the forum!
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poppers
One of the real pleasures of this board for me is how people reach out to those who are hurting, especially at the hands of the WT. I add my welcome to all of those fine folks. Keep coming here for support and friendship - you are among friends.
poppers
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Lady Liberty
Dear Daringhart13,
First of all....((HUGS))
Second..."WELCOME"!!!
You have definately come to the right place if your looking for others who understand!! Most here have been through the same feelings of hurt, loss and confusion. It does take time, but I PROMISE things will get better. You will no doubt be like most of us who have found out the truth about the "truth", experiencing a full spectrum of emotions. Confusion, denial, devistation, hurt, anger...and finally PEACE!! It took me about 2 years of research every spare minute I had outside of working full time, being a wife and a mom to finally be able to be at peace with what I had discovered and to be able to close that chapter of my life and to be able to move forward.
Once you finally do, you will feel like a bird who has flown for the very first time!!! You will experience life from a totally different prospective! I will never forget the first time it hit me, was when I was sitting in a airplane waiting for the plane to depart, watching all the other people baord the plane. I thought to myself, "All these people, are my brothers and sisters!!" It was such a awesome feeling. I had only viewed JWs as my brothers and sisters. How closed minded I had been my whole life!! I never thought of myself as being very judgemental, but after leaving, I would experiece little revelations such as this, that would make me realize how very wrong I was!
All I can suggest, is the more research you can do, to find out the truth about the organization, the faster you will go through the process of emotions and be emotionally free!! Hang in there!! You will find many friends on this forum. And you will find some have been so hurt, that they no longer believe in God. But you will find that there are many who still have been able to maintain and have a close relationship with him. For my husband and I, we firmly believe that without God's Holy Spirit, comfort and direction, there is no way we would have been able to come out of this whole thing as well as we have. We prayed for direction and strength . And to find out the truth..wether it would be what we had always been taught...or if not to find out what it really is. And we were never more driven to continue on our journey. Our prayers were answered, and we found the comfort and strength we so desperately needed. One thing to keep in mind about this forum is that, we do not all agree with one another..but that is ok. We still love and support each other in that we are all on different stages of our journey, and has been very difficult for most.
Now, after several years, we are completly content, happy, and living a life that we are sure is being blessed by God. If you would like to read our story, I welcome you to do so, as you may find its contents very helpful to you. This forum was VITAL to us, in that we found others, like ourselves, had discovered the same things, and it was a HUGE source of information that would have taken us a lifetime if ever to compile.
So, be strong, hang on, and keep your relationship with your heavely father as close as you can!
Sincerely,
Lady Liberty
PS. My computer won't let me copy and paste the link...so if you look me up under members, it is the very first post I ever made entitled, "It's high time I introduce myself"....