No I don't believe anyone here has been permanently warped by the Borg any more than your parents could do the same to you.

by gubberningbody 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • gubberningbody
    gubberningbody

    You are who you are so much more due to your own peculiar genetic inheritance, and this is what eventually prevails.

    There was a longitudinal study I read a number of years ago that tested the idea that we all have inborn "happiness setpoints". These people in the study were followed through 20-25 years and periodically examined as regards their self-reported measures of happiness. The finding was that no matter what happened either positively or negatively in their lives, within 8-12 weeks they were universally back to their baseline.

    This means a couple of things:

    If you left the Borg in a dramatic fashion, within 8-12 weeks of adjustment you'd be pretty much as happy as you've ever been.

    Too, for many here I imagine that the only thing the constant grating contact with the Borg could do is force you remain chronically BELOW your natural set point.

    The deciding factor on staying or leaving then should be a matter of what you want. (but don't imagine that leaving will ratchet you to higher levels of happiness than those you'd ever felt periodically in the Borg) For me, the constant boredom, petty annoyances and tiny minds that predominated the KH made it clear to me that no possible meeting of the minds could ever occur and moreover those who were there were either not interested, capable or felt at liberty to discuss openly the things I had a real hunger for discussing.

    Leaving the Borg, was like taking the weight vest off and running. My blood pressure has gone down, I feel more compassion for others and I feel like the usual crabby-non-depressed-aggressive person that I was born to be.

    If someone of my former associates decide they want to leave the cess-pool, then I'd be glad to talk to them, but until then, for me they're just toxic association.

  • transhuman68
    transhuman68

    I suppose the question is, would you rather be free and unhappy, or enslaved and unhappy. Just as money can't buy you happiness, would you rather be rich and unhappy or poor and unhappy? If you leave the Borg at least you will have much more free time to be yourself...

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    I would really want to see the criteria used for a "happiness setpoint".

    Life in a closed system affects how we see the world. Sometimes it takes years of work to undo the damage. Often therapy is required.

    Some people never recover. Especially those who stay unsnared by WT beliefs long after they have left there is no "happily ever after".

    Many people who leave the JWs continue to believe the fault lies with them; they can't meet the WTS' standards; they are defective. What your inborn abilities could have been can never be accurately assessed.

  • gubberningbody
    gubberningbody

    Actually, that's not the point at all. The point is that no matter what you do, you can't make permanent changes to your happiness/unhappiness levels. You CAN find the things that REDUCE your happiness below base-line and get rid of those, though.

  • dinah
    dinah

    Thank you, Lady Lee.

  • gubberningbody
    gubberningbody

    Lady, I know that some people would like to cling to their unhappiness and attribute it to some circumstance or situation that was outside them, but the data doesn't support that rather common belief.

    http://www.apa.org/monitor/dec07/happiness.aspx

    The above is a middle ground position. It admits to the set-point, but also that certain chronic environmental conditions might alter slightly up or down the person's general levels of happiness.

    It simply isn't helpful to try to convince people that they have been forever damaged by their experiences when:

    1. It doesn't help them get better.

    2. It's mostly not true.

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    So basically the study says if you are born miserable you will stay miserable and if you are happy you stay happy (all stresses aside of course)

  • HintOfLime
    HintOfLime

    The finding was that no matter what happened either positively or negatively in their lives, within 8-12 weeks they were universally back to their baseline.

    Anyone who's been through a divorce after a long marriage may take issue with that timeframe... I know I do.

    - Lime

  • peaches
    peaches

    8 to 12 weeks???????????????????? good grief!!! it took me longer than that just to beable to hold my head up when i entered a room (true)

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep
    If you left the Borg in a dramatic fashion, within 8-12 weeks of adjustment you'd be pretty much as happy as you've ever been.

    You must be talking about in some rare circumstances, or when people have whatever it takes to just walk away from their homes, parents, children, spouses etc. and stash their memories on some dark mental shelf where they can pretend they never existed.

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