Bang on Bane
Why should I have to sign a letter saying I want to disassociate ?
by troubled mind 84 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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cantleave
Love it mrsjones !!!!!!
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Finally-Free
Man....The elders are concerned about you.
You sound like your tongue is firmly inserted in their rectums.
W
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HintOfLime
Huge bunch of jerks here. Man....The elders are concerned about you. And you treat them in this manner. Look at all these posts. People can certainly see the difference between an apostate and a geniune christian like Jehovah´s witnesses.
How is the elders asking for a DA letter showing 'concern'? Please explain that to me.
They're not concerned about you. They are concerned about their power over you and others. They want you to lend them a knife so they can stab you in the back. If you give them the letter, you give them permission to judge and damn you with it.
Elders are nothing more than power-happy men who master the art of false humility. If you ask a serious, direct questions that expose them for the petty bullies that they are - instead of high and mighty 'elders' - they won't be motivated to contact you.
- Lime
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aquagirl
Yes Bane,one can certainly see the difference.Yes indeed.Baaaaaaaah
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GLTirebiter
Bane,
TM has issued a Cease and Desist against them. Attempting to make contact when contact is clearly and explicitly unwanted is not a display of concern. It is harassment, perhaps stalking (depending on the circumstances).
In a domestic relations case where there is a "no contact" order, is it a display of concern to ignore that order and come knocking on the door? No, it's an invasion of privacy, it's harassment, and it's against the law.
Why do you think this is any different? The elders are not above the law. A "true Christian" renders unto Ceasar that which is due to Ceasar, including obedience to the law.
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wasblind
bane after 100 post.
your officially one of us
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wantstoleave
TM so sorry you're going through this!! Let us know how it went with the police officer calling the elder. And also if the harassment stops or continues. I doubt it will but I suspect given that you've sent them a letter and the police are involved, they'll probably disfellowship you anyhow. Or at least announce you're no longer a witness. Either way, you are under no obligation to write a disassociation letter. I do understand that for some it is much needed closure, but you don't have to do it. If you do, it will definitely stop the harassment but I appreciate your reasoning behind not doing so ie. not part of a club etc.
Did you have xmas decorations up in winter? And they saw anti witness videos on your page? Sounds like they were stalking you and I suspect many elders do this on the sly, trying to catch people out. My question is, if they saw all this...how come they didn't form a JC already with/without your attendance and disfellowship you? What I mean is, how come they've left it so long?
You're doing great and have more guts than I do! I'm too chicken to do anything right now...lol.
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ziddina
I DA'd, but I think it must have been a surprise to them...
I'd been in a miserable JW marriage for 10 years, married to an absolute hypocrite and slacker. I decided to deliberately "break the marriage vows" so I could get a divorce. [Looking back on it, I needn't have bothered having a "one-night stand"... I could have just "made stuff up" and confessed it...]
So, I was put on "public reproof" because I went ahead and got a divorce. I was supposedly "in the process of working my way back into the 'good graces' of "Jehovah's Holy Organization" [barf... ], but in the meantime I was getting more and more 'tastes' of what it was like to be FREE - er, "worldly"...
I decided I liked my freedom so much, that I just DA'd and never looked back... The idiot elders - well, one of them - had been very judgmental about my escape from the bad marriage. I still laugh when I think of how he must have 'harummphed' when he found out I'd ESCAPED...!
Man, it felt good to dump EVERYTHING - the cult, my vicious, smothering parents, the namby-pamby nitwits in the cult who pretended to be my 'friends' - oh, and the "good little Jehovah-boy" ex-husband - and just RUN LIKE HELL!!!
Zid
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troubled mind
Hello all ....I just noticed this thread had some fresh posts so I thought I would respond .
Bane,
You have NO idea what kind of 'concern' these brothers have shown . If they truly displayed loving Christian 'concern' they would not have waited four years to stop by and lovingly seek our association once again . Rather they waited until they thought there might be a sliver of a chance to dump us officially to 'stop' by and shepard us .It was the Elder that brought up the idea for me to disassociate . He did not address my questions with any sincerity . Even though he started his discussion with "We miss you and want you to come back " ,at the end he admitted... the real reason for their visit 'was to find out if I was now celebrating Christmas '.(a disfellowshipping offense ) I told him then I refused to discuss any personal matters with him .
My husband made it clear during their visit he is spiritually hurting and lost ........yet after the visit all the phone calls were directed only to ME, and about discussing further 'concerns' they had . You need to understand when an Elder uses that term 'concerns' he is really saying, " We think we have something on you that is considered wrong doing and we want to guilt you into submission ."
If there was true Christian love and Holy Spirit motivating them ,they would have called my husband ,and offered support ,and guidance to him . In four years no one came and offered a kind word to him ,not even his own family that includes two Elders ! ( We had been part of this congregation for over thirty years ,always faithful ,always in attendance . ) We have caused no problems ...just walked away .
They then began calling my house multiple times ,leaving messages for me to call back ASAP . They came to my door multiple times ,and we refused to answer . If someone does not answer or return your calls wouldn't you get the hint they don't wish to talk to you ?
Finally I did answer my phone and reiterated once again that I would not answer personal questions about my life with them . I formally requested at that time for the Elders to cease contact .
How many times should a person have to ask to be left alone ? When the Elder called again ,acknowledging he had been told of my request ,choosing to disregard my wishes .......Is when I decided to make it legal ......WHAT choice did they leave me ??? I no longer recognize their supposed authority ,and I WILL not be intimitated .
So Bane .......I can not explain any clearer . The love and concern you speak of is NOT what I was experiencing .What I was feeling was badgered .
I have no ill wishes for these men . I only require they repect my personal right to privacy .