what is best to use to help my kids out? What does a teenager need to hear?

by Aussie Oz 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • Aussie Oz
    Aussie Oz

    Now that i have secured more time with my children and i have established my interest in the religious side of their lives i wonder what is best next.

    What sort of material is best to use to get them thinking? I will not TELL them much at all. I want to get THEM THINKING.

    What sort of real truths matter to teens in the JWs these days?

    I know that they dont beleive everything, such as shunning and that worldly people are all bad. But i know that is not enough to stop them getting sucked in. My son is already doing the mikes... grooming him to 'reach out'. They are now very well aware of the reality of shunning.

    any ideas? Any teens on here?

    oz

  • designs
    designs

    When they see teenagers getting shunned and reproved that will be a moment to have a discussion about how problems are handled inside the Society. That was the wakeup call to my kids, seeing how teenage problems are handled and the lack of counseling or any programs to genuinely help young people.

    Keep saving funds for college or a technical trade school, they'll thank you over and over again.

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Thinking skills mate.

    de Bono. It may well help them get a decent job in the future as a bonus. Worked for my son. I had de Bono's book Lateral Thinking and went through the excercises with him. He ain't fully in and he ain't full out, but he does recognise a faulty argument when he hears one and recognises that he has used one when it is pointed out. It makes it a lot more difficult for him to deal with the cognitive dissonance.

    I wish we'd had de Bono's current books to play with. They are even better. I have given him one for his kids.

    Cheers

    Chris

  • sacolton
    sacolton

    "Hey, kids, did you know a long time ago some people taught the earth was flat? After much research, it was discovered the earth is actually round. Some religions are like that, teaching their own understanding when it is not truth. The Watchtower is like that -- teaching that we still live on a flat earth. Only after researching the history of the Watchtower do you understand that they have been wrong on everything. Let's not follow those who still teach falsehoods."

  • Scarred for life
    Scarred for life

    My kids are 24, 21, and 15.

    15 year old- Social life, making spending money, staying fit, starting to think about college and what she wants to do for a career.

    21 year old- Friends, culinary arts training, future full-time job

    24 year old- In college to become an elementary school teacher, friends, part-time job to make money for living expenses.

    These are the priorities of my children. The older 2 also have spiritual beliefs and church and living right are important to them. They stay clear of going down a "bad" path. They like to hang out with friends that feel the same way.

    The 15 year old is more concerned about NOW. Her social life TODAY. What are her plans for TONIGHT. It's harder for her to look beyond today or next week.

  • Butterflyleia85
    Butterflyleia85

    Agree with Scarred for life.

    Social life! Friends and being excepted. Being looked at as a cool yet good person. Freedom in a sence of individuality... but not so much out of the social click.

  • Butterflyleia85
    Butterflyleia85

    If anything allowing them to be themselves and encouraging their talents out side of the spiritual walls of JW. Focus on being supportive and yet also encouraging them to be a good person. My fiance who isn't JW has this book on Ethics and Ethical Theory... basicly what he had to read in college. It was the use of good in human nature... Anyways just keep it simple for them in their teenage years and fun! This is the prim years of learning and growing... finding individualty yet a place in this world.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Just like jws in general, if you directly confront or challenge their beliefs it pushes them deeper into them. Even if you make a sound point, cognitive dissonance sets in. I starting investigating when a bible student asked me a question I could not answer. While I moved on suffering CD, I kept coming back to that question. A year later I had been reading the Proclaimers book and realized how much had been left out giving the accounts a wrong slant. I investigated my old Divine Purpose book, the 1975 yearbook, and started reading the older books my family had in their library.

    But in the end, it was how people treated each other at the KH that convinced me. Why weren't people showing Christian love, and when admitting it wasn't, excusing it because people were imperfect. I was smart enough to see what was deliberate and what was accidental.

    So show love to your children, be respectful of their mother even if she is not respectful to you. One person at work told me that it was more effective if we lived a sermon, than preached one.

    If they do have questions, answer just that question, perhaps even asking your own question (the point about what age Jesus was baptized was very interesting. I grew up around the WTS and I would have known that answer...It was discussed in 2 study articles in the last year).

    I think Steve Hassan's book has some good points about how to talk to them without riling up the cult self.

    May things go well, Blondie

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Pop in here and check out if it has anything interesting

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    The University library has a copy of De cruce libri if that's any use to you.

    You would have to do your homework first so that you knew what to show them. Kids have a short attention span so I would just give them a quick visit to show them something interesting on the way to something far more exciting.

    I doubt many JWs have ever laid eyes on a dinky di copy of it, let alone know the implications of what it contains.

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