Struggling

by EmptyInside 44 Replies latest jw friends

  • EmptyInside
    EmptyInside

    It's just my personality to go the fade route, but I can't handle it anymore. I lost respect for myself. I won't write a DA letter out of respect for family. But, I'm thinking of telling everyone, I'm going through some issues and need a break from everything.

    My health is getting worse. It turns out I have legitimate reasons for missing the meetings, because my stomach is bothering me a lot of the time. And it's all wearing me out.

    What makes it even harder, is sometimes I doubt myself. I doubt the doubts I'm having if that makes any sense. Looking back, even as a young person, I would look around at school at my classmates, and wonder, what makes me so special to be born in the only true religion.

    Throughout the years, I've been weaker and then stronger, but always in the back of my mind, questioning everything. While in the ministry, my words to the householder sounded hollow, simplistic. I wanted to believe it so bad. I felt I had a relationship with God.

    Now, it is not easy figuring all this out, and taking much longer than I thought. But, again, that is my personality too. It takes me awhile to plan and organize, but once I make up my mind, it's done.

    Well, that's what is going through my mind while not attending the Thursday night meeting.

  • serenitynow!
    serenitynow!

    I suggest that you see a therapist; specifically one that has knowledge of cults. Even though your stomach problems could be related to your inner turmoil (stress), you should see a doctor to have it checked out. Probably everyone feels the same way when they first find out the truth. I did. I felt physically ill, depressed, angry. I doubted myself too. It will get better.

  • cult classic
    cult classic

    "I doubt the doubts I'm having if that makes any sense."

    That totally makes sense. I had that vague dis-ease for a while before we left. It is an awful feeling. Don't rush yourself. Allow yourself to experience whatever feelings and thoughts you have without judging yourself. And remember you don't owe anyone an explanation. Do what you can and what is absolutely necessary and drop the rest.

    You'll feel better soon.

  • leavingwt
    leavingwt

    If you stay away from ALL meetings, you'll start feeling better within a few short weeks. Begin immediately strengthening bonds with people outside the organization.

  • sherah
    sherah

    Fading ain't for everyone. Maybe now is the time to bow out, cold turkey.

  • 5thGeneration
    5thGeneration

    It's just my personality to go the fade route, but I can't handle it anymore. I lost respect for myself. I won't write a DA letter out of respect for family. But, I'm thinking of telling everyone, I'm going through some issues and need a break from everything.

    That is EXACTLY where I am right now. EXACTLY!

    I even discussed with a family member last week about just throwing in the towel and DA myself already.

    Problem is, my kids and family.

    This is sheer hell.

    5th

    PM if you want Empty.

  • moshe
    moshe

    Fading=lying and if you are feeling bad, then that is probably what is making you sick. Go to the Dr- get some help for your anxiety. Good luck.

  • 5thGeneration
    5thGeneration

    Moshe,

    You always pop up to delegitimize what people are going through trying to fade.

    Why can't you just understand it's not that easy for a lot of us to just give the finger to our family, friends and decades of indoctrination and expectations. In my case, a century of tradition.

    Give it a rest already.

    We know, we know... "You were so strong".

    Well, a lot of us are still 'struggling' and despite your incessant badgering to tell everyone to fuck off, it's not that easy for a lot of us.

    5th

  • flipper
    flipper

    EMPTYINSIDE- I'm sorry you are struggling right now. Please be assured of my wife and my caring, as well as the fine folks on the board here . It isn't easy for sure at times. The advice you had to seek professional counseling was very good advice indeed . Especially if these down times re-occur regularly. But I agree with Leaving WT- If you stay away from all meetings you will gradually start feeling more upbeat and by developing friends outside the JW cult- you will develop interests and hobbies which will keep you busy also. Just a few things which helped me once I stopped attending 7 years ago. Hang in there, if you ever need to talk, just PM me friend, we'll talk. Hang in there

  • What-A-Coincidence
    What-A-Coincidence

    read awaken the giant within by anthony robbins and get back with me

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