Looking back I'm glad I didn't marry my ex.
How was dating as Jehovah Witness?
by Pitchess Co-Gen 45 Replies latest jw experiences
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cheerios
it was dreadful, completely and utterly dreadful. what is worse is that the "rules" force people to marry incompatible people, largely due to dating-inexperience. perhaps if dating was more liberal, there wouldnt be so many JW train-wreck marriages. but alas, it isnt to be. im sure that the Gibbering Buddy wants to put back arranged marriages at some point
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bohm
Really good, we are still together!
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St George of England
Ignored all the rules about chaperones etc, even went on holiday together albeit to a DC.
Still happily married after 40+ years
George
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JRK
If I knew then what I know now . . . I would have been an even worse bad boy!
JK
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DagothUr
I was allowed a lot of freedom concerning dating, in my ex-district. I knew many elders, many of them worked for my family at least once, I have a steady financial situation, I was MS material...I can't complain...Everyone was trying to introduce me to the ladies. And I was happy to oblige.
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Nickolas
I will put forward only one important benefit from being married to a Jehovah's Witness for almost 33 years. There has never been a question of fidelity.
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miseryloveselders
The worst is dating nonJWs, trying to live a double life. During high school, and for a time as a young adult, I had some hook-ups, and dated outside Da Troof. It's tough trying to concentrate on enjoying your time with a woman, when in the back of your mind all you can think of, "is please don't let me get seen, Puuuhhhleeeese!!!!" One incident, I was in field service with a half dozen or so other JWs, and we took a lunch break at Wendy's. We sit down to grub, and who do I see sitting across from me? A worldy girl I hung out with a couple months before. I couldn't act like I didn't know her, but I couldn't act like I knew her all too well either! So she waived, and The Friends noticed. So I politely excused myself and ate my lunch with her. Later they asked me what hall she went to. I told them she wasn't a JW, but someone I went to school with who I hadn't seen in a while. Then we went and did RVs. The whole time I'm thinking to myself, "boy was that close." She was wrapping up her Master's Degree the last I heard. She reminded me of Sharon Leal, who is a beautiful woman.
Another instance I was doing door to door in the summertime, and I knew a gal lived in this neighborhood but I couldn't remember where. She was gorgous, I mean beautiful. Half Columbian, quarter Italian/quarter Irish. She was a head turner, and very down to earth. We linked up a couple times. Had it not been for this crazy wacked out religion, I would have put a ring on her finger. She's the type of gal you'd lay your life on the line for. It would be honorable to lose your life while trying to protect hers. Very down to earth, very spontaneious, street smart, street savvy, very intelligent, very genuine, just a very wonderful gal. Part of the reason I didn't pursue anything with her was she was getting ready to go away for college, that and the JW thing. Anyways, walking down the street with an older brother, who do I see all the way atop some steps? Again, I told the brother to excuse me, I know her personally, and I have some work related matters to ask her about and that I'll catch up with the rest of the group later. The fact that it was hot outside, and I talked to her outside on the porch made it possible to downplay any suspicions The Friends might have had. Crazy!! Situations like that are why I stopped doing the double life thing, and took the JW thing all too seriously. It was just too stressful trying to live both lives like that. I had several situations like that.
As far as dating other JWs, there's no way in the world I'm letting someone chaperone me. I'm a grown man, and I don't need anyone watching me. The one thing I hate when it comes to dating JWs, is its a very small world in this religion. News spreads fast, and I'm a very private, reserved person. I don't like people knowing my business. JWs don't need to know what I do for a living, heck I'd be happy if none of them knew my name.
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Nickolas
I hear several tones in your post, MLE. There's a little nostalgia but regret is more prominent. Sounds to me that wordly girl might have taken you to bed but for your own reserved nature. My theory is that the adventuresome lives of young adult Jehovah's witnesses are taken away from them for all time.
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miseryloveselders
I hear several tones in your post, MLE. There's a little nostalgia but regret is more prominent. Sounds to me that wordly girl might have taken you to bed but for your own reserved nature. My theory is that the adventuresome lives of young adult Jehovah's witnesses are taken away from them for all time.
You read me all too well Nick, all too well. Sometimes I wish life could be like a Vodka commercial, but it doesn't work like that. I don't want to sound like I'm bragging, but quite a few made themselves available to me. The moral hangup prevented me from the sexual side of it all, and the religious hangup prevented me from doing whats natural, that being dating and getting married, having a couple crumbsnatchers. Now that I'm going apostate, and am in my early thirties, I'm thinking I missed out on quite a lot. Being dedicated to an organization is not a healthy way to live one's life. Everything that's natural is viewed negatively, including the theme of this thread, dating. Somedays it aint fair, life should be more like Vodka commercials, but life is more like that Simply Red song from way back. Can't recall the name of that song LOL.