Sorry I was trying to start a new post
I was BANE...I have an apology to most of you.
by Botzwana 129 Replies latest jw friends
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TheListener
I now feel that something lives on after we die. I am not certain how it all works, but I am certain that something of us returns to God to await resurrection. There was a debate on the old Touchstone Forum and the biblical texts and logical arguments presented (by both sides) finally convinced me that something lives on after we die.
I never realized that as a witness I claimed to believe in Jesus while at the same time dismissing his lofty position. It was constantly saying Jehovah this and Jehovah that. I, and most witnesses I knew/know, used the name Jehovah at least 100 times a day. It was almost as if it was an unconcious lucky charm (even though I would never have said lucky). Now that I'm out I don't think Jehovah is as good a name for God as say Yahweh. But, I don't use any name as a talisman anymore. I figure if children aren't supposed to call their parents by their first name out of respect perhaps I should tone down my use of God's name out of respect as well.
I have read and plotted on a piece of paper Revelation chapter 20 (and read other individuals thoughts/studies as well). Sounds dumb when I type it, but it helped me sort out the timeframe of things a little better. Especially if you tie in 1 Thess. and 1 Cor 15.
I have read a lot of books and information on the Apostle Paul and first century christianity. I have treated it much like a history lesson and have come to see that things weren't always they way I had been taught and imagined. At the very least I learned alternative thoughts and understandings on first century historical issues (related to christians) that I always considered a particular way.
I guess what I am saying botzwana is that many things you believe now you believe because that is what you were told and you were shown specific information to back that opinion up. Now you are just starting out on the road of discovery for yourself. Am I wrong about my thoughts above? Perhaps. The point is I decided for myself based on my relationship with Jesus Christ, my study and my discussions with fellow christians. I feel great that I can love Jesus, his father, my fellow christians and myself while still learning and gaining knowledge without feeling pressured to conform to a particular individual or groups philosophies or creeds.
I wish you the very best on your journey. A friend once told me (as I was exiting the witnesses) that the road I was embarking on would be a long and lonely one, filled with pitfalls. He was right, but he forgot to mention that it would end up being the most rewarding road I ever went down. I have never felt more fulfilled in my life and at peace with myself.
Good luck botzwana!
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Think About It
I love the word, "Scripturizing"
Would have been cool if Bane came back to JWN as.........The Scripturizer. Everyone would have known it was him. Nice having him back. Wonder if Alice will ever come back in a similar manner?
Think About It
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warmasasunned
i always admire people who are'nt proud and are happy to admit they may have made a mistake.....
keep thinking in that logical manner and you can keep making honest descions for your own benifit....
goodluck.
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Botzwana
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M0mRHgbGDww&feature=related
I just love this song. Wished I could have sang it before I left. I would tear this song up! I have training from song and dance from New York back in my younger years. I notice that there are MANY members here. Is there anyway that there is another website or maybe I could PM someone to explain the crap I am going through? Is there an apostate counselor for ones that just left?
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darkuncle29
Wow, very interesting. Good luck Bane. So how far down the Rabbit Hole are you going to go?
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Botzwana
Meaning what DarkUncle?
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Botzwana
Well just to give a little update I haven't been back in a month. So I gave my kingston to a "brother" on the last meeting to charge it with his music. During that month he refuses to give it to me claiming his mother is sick etc. So I say he is holding it hostage as a joke. Anyway he gives it to the main man Elder. The Elder wants to meet with me about my decision to go to the spanish meetings instead of English. It's my way of fading. I will never attend again but they will THINK I'm in spanish...So I say I will see him at next Sunday's meeting to pick up the kingston. So my wife and I drop by the Elder's house tonight claiming we were in the neighborhood. I picked it up and he wishes me well. I get back home AFTER a month of not having the kingston and the "kindly" brother didn't charge ANYTHING on it. What a frickin liar!
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Darth plaugeis
I feel for you...
When you finally see those you Trusted... can lie....
No turning back.
I hope your being sincere!
