I had to give a talk away today, which came up somewhat unexpected. I had a couple days to get this outline together, and thats sufficient enough time for me, but I prefer knowing a week in advance. At any rate, it all worked out. The hall I was visiting, had a sister I made a play at several years ago. She wasn't interested, and at the time it bothered me, but not excessively. I could handle rejection back then, you know like easy come, easy go. I'd be lying if I didn't say I really was interested in her though. But oh well, it wasn't meant to be. Well, I saw her today for the first time in several years, and you know I really didn't give a flying f#$# about her, and you know what, that felt good. She's married now, to a cocky brother. My impressions of him may be distorted as I don't know him all that well. He may be a very good dude for all I know, and I hope they're happy together, I really mean that. I thought they looked cute together sitting in the audience. It's just funny to me how people come and go in life, and my father told me that would be the case years ago, and I didn't understand nor believe him. The guys I was hanging with back then, I thought would be with me until I died. Life doesn't work out that way though. People really do come and go. People live and die. The world changes, the world stays the same, and as people we live, and inevitably we die. It's not really such a bad thing when you sit down, meditate, and put it all into perspective. It is what it is.
I looked at her from the platform, and looked down at her big beautiful eyes which were like root beer flavored jolly ranchers, and I felt nothing but indifference. She could die tommorrow in a bad automobile accident, and I can say with the utmost sincerity that I wouldn't lose any sleep over her. Not that I wouldn't be sympathetic, but at the same time it aint all about her. I imagine she feels the same about me, if she feels anything at all. Regardless of what her feelings are, I really don't give a f#$#. Its funny how the attraction to the opposite sex can alter so much about us as people with feelings. We dress to impress them, we educate ourselves, we offer our material posessions to win their heart. We offer our emotions, our artistry, all in an attempt to win and ultimately gain their affections. And for what? Is it really worth it in the end? I doubt it. Do you know how much toilet paper women go through in a week? Its proposterous. Its obscene that a woman can go through several rolls of toilet paper a week. A good foreign car won't go through as much as gas in a week as a woman will go through toilet paper.
I digress, I've got a little tanqueray in me, a little diphenhydramine in me which is yet to kick in. I'm planning on hitting the sack early tonight. This week is going to be a busy week at work, and I'm looking forward to it. There's plenty to accomplish this week, and I plan on doing that and then some. She'll live her life with her husband, who by the way I could take his head right off of his shoulders if I really wanted to. That guy has no idea what I could do to him physically. It would be ungodly. But I don't need to do that. He's got her, and I'm happy for the both of them. I'm happy for Aaron Rodgers tonight too, he deserved a ring. Well, G'night all.
Sincerely, MLE(Emily)