These are some things I have been thinking about . . .
When I first found this site I registered immediately ... never was a "lurker" ... and I've been here about six months.
Everyone was very warm welcoming and I felt at home very quickly ... very pleasant at the time, but as time has progressed I look back and feel a bit "love-bombed" ... much like a religion I used to belong to.
I have found that this site is a bit "cliquey" ... groups of posters frequent at similar times and enjoy their familiarity with each other and that's great ... but they also sometimes exhibit a coolness toward those outside their clique ... almost as if your 'post count' is the first thing by which you are "judged" ... much like a religion I used to belong to
Some posters develop a personal dislike for others and not only jump on their threads but even deliver the odd "slap" on unrelated threads to increase the discomfort for the object of their dislike ... not unlike a religion I once belonged to.
Some posters even follow others around the board looking to counter or use snide or clever put downs at every opportunity ... a kind of intellectual "rivalry" that was common to those in that religion I used to belong to.
Many posters like to use 'in-house' jargon and labels eg; "newbies" for those recently joined. I find it somewhat of a 'status' labelling which was a regular and distasteful feature of a religion I used to belong to.
The community is often intolerant of certain 'types' and displays a desire by many to shape the site to fit thier personal requirements of what sort of community they feel it should be ... very reminiscent of a religion I once belonged to.
There exists the provision for Personal Messaging which is frequently hybridised with cryptic public expression ... a bit like 'gossip' ... my old religion was notorious for that
Many have described the site as a "half-way house" for exiting JW's. I don't dispute that and wonder if the "half" that lies in the past (JW world) still has a strong influence here.
People are people and maybe these things are just common to men/women everywhere ... but I don't think so. A good number here still have strong ties (family in etc) to Watchtower world and the JW religion still has a promonent place in their lives ... and I genuinely feel for them ... We were fortunate to escape with family intact and have no relatives who are JW.
All said and done ... I am now feeling closer to my old JW past than before I arrived ... and that is troubling ... especially when I am regularly confronted by what I take to be very JW-esque mind-sets.
Perhaps this was always the wrong place for me ... perhaps my 'life-cycle' was always meant to be short ... I don't really know.
On a positive note ... this is (can be?) a great provision for those exiting the JW cult ... it's only real value in my opinion. I have enjoyed having the opportunity to share something of value with these ones. Also, I have met some terrific people here, and in spite of my short time here, I will remember their kindness and friendship (especially during the recent Earthquakes) for quite some time ... to them, thank you ... and all the very best
I wish everybody well in their journey ... and I hope I haven't offended anybody by my honesty ... but I don't belong here anymore ... and I just wanted to bid farewell.
Goodbye to you ... Murray Smith (sizemik)