Sorry I am late to post. Work.
Regarding Dawn, this is what I can say. I am a romantic person myself, but I believe in the hard and cold facts as well. I think giving people false hope is one of the worst things you can do. So I tend to be blunt, cold, and perhaps even very aggressive in matters of the heart.
With the information I have now about Jehovah's witnesses, I can tell you that he knew what his options were when he first met you. His options were:
1) stay out forever, with the plus that he could be with you.
2) return to the Watchtower, but willing to marry you as an unbeliever (hopefully not messing too much with that fact), and
3) asking you to convert.
He gave himself plenty of time to get to know you. So he knows you'd be a good wife and he could see himself living with you. But, and this is a big "but", he is going for option number 3. He wants you to convert because that way it would be easier for him. He wouldn't lose his own life and his own family. You would lose yours. That doesn't seem fair.
In my opinion, he has reasons other than family to want to go back. If having his family were all he wanted, then he wouldn't ask you to join. My impression is that he doesnt' want to feel he is marrying an unbeliever.
He knows he could be with you even if he went back. Maybe he's pushing for his "best scenario" first. But my concern is with you, Dawn, and so my recommendation is that you do not convert. If he wants you as an unbeliever, then he may have you. Love implies taking the other person's need in consideration. This way he could have his family and you could have yours.
As to Tatty's question, my reason to believe I could have done a lot more for the witness of my story if I had hidden my feelings is very simple. Think of what I have told Dawn. We could have been together if she had chosen to marry an unbeliever; but she didn't. I had the feeling that she had serious reservations about the organization, but, if that was the case, those reservations were not enough to make her feel comfortable with the idea of having me.
Now that she knows I loved her, I became Satan's way to lure her out of the right path. She finds endless calls to appreciate the gift of her new singlehood, and she is constantly reminded how wrong it is to marry an unbeliever. Or to love an unbeliever.
So, if I had chosen to hide my feelings, I would have continued to be a co-worker she can talk to. Perhaps I could have planted some doubts into her. Maybe I could have given her the copies of Crisis of Conscience and In Search of Christian Freedom I bought specifically for her. But because I came on too strongly, I am bad now.
I remember that one time we shared a breakfast. She already knew I loved her. While we were in line to get our plates, I told her that we could say a prayer together. She went to the table very quickly, and started her prayers alone. When I arrived, she said "I prayed already". She could have taken advantage of that opportunity to lure me into the Watchtower. Since she didn't, I have the feeling that she didn't want to have "spiritual fellowship" with me.
But beyond that, she feels free to talk to other co-workers and even stay at their homes if she needs to. Me, I am Satan. One time I asked her why it was that we couldn't hang out like we used to, and she said, "Because I believe in the Bible, and I know I need to avoid occasions that could make me fall".
Even if I hadn't planted seeds of doubt, I could have played a positive role in other senses. She made a couple of stupid decisions, work-wise, so she could move to where the need is greater. Perhaps she could have been convinced not to do that by a friend, a worldly who seems nice and seems to really care about her, as opposed to this instrument of Satan who was always showing her how much he loved her.
