Why is a condescending person your "favorite" anything?
Start by analyzing and answering that question, and you will be well on your way to discovering the appropriate action to take.
What action should I take with my favorite cousin who is very condescending?
by RULES & REGULATIONS 24 Replies latest jw friends
-
-
flipper
From observing this conversation your cousin seems like a very self centered person who is rude, boorish, and needs a good lesson in manners OR a good swift kick in the a$$ . You might consider the latter if you try to explain to him his rudeness and he doesn't respond. On second thought- he may not be worth getting an assault charge filed against you. If he doesn't change- cut him out of your life. No need to have negative people being emotional vampires sucking the life out of you. I've had to make stands like that with people as well. Especially if you have health issues- you don't need his negative crap brining you down. Just my 2 cents
-
Band on the Run
Justititia,
I believe you are on target. From my own experience, I can analyze msyelf without mercy. Years of actual therapy and decades of every self help group, not to mention Twelve Step, all help my insight. I found when I first left the Witnesses that mere insight doesn't get me very far. I know I am seemingly trapped in patterns that I abhor. Everything is so sharp in mind. I move like a gazelle from one encounter to another. Reality means I move like a hippo, meandering all over. I can simulatenously know to say somethingt to assert msyelf, observe myself not doing it and doing nothing.
My sister is exhibit no. 1. No contact for 30 years. We talk now and I am grateful. My preferred fantasy would be do so well as to have no need for her. It varies from moment to moment but the more I can limit interactions with appropriate boundaries I feel better than just getting rid of people. My cousin was gone forever that day.
I've been asserting mysef more recently and I've found to my utter shock that many people thank me profusely. Not everyone. A clumsy statement that is my life, not yours, coupled with the observation that I was extremely controlling, helps so much. B/c of my experience, I think most controlling people are trying to manage their own chaos and are wit's end.
It remains a muddle to me. I trust that God, Higher Power, Jesus gives me the insight and the courage to act. Maybe the trend is more important than telling any one person off. Personally, I'd be very angry with cousin.
-
Snoozy
I would be honest with him and tell him what you feel/think and if things don't change say goodby..he just may surprise you and not realize how insensitive he is being..
Snoozy
-
kurtbethel
He might have felt you were dithering too much, indicated by comparing you to his dad. So he would feel comfortable with you deciding something and getting on with it. Whatever he has going, he lacks tact and sensitivity.