What is better? Disassociation or Disfellowshipping?
by Quarterback 30 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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Iamallcool
it depends on their situation.
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scooterspank
That is a really tough question. I have managed a successful fade. Those alternatives will leave you in the position of being shunned. I guess it depends on what you have to lose or not lose. Given the choice, with no consequences, I would disassociate in a heartbeat. I would never give those ******** the satisfaction of giving me the boot. I actually have days, almost 20 years later, that I think about disassociating myself...oh the letter I would write. Anyway, tough choice, lots of good advice on this site.
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Evidently Apostate
its thesame thing from the platform and in any dubs mind. if you want to go out on your own terms then DA unless you feel the need to explain your actions to 3 uninterested men but in the end your out. consider it a victory.
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OnTheWayOut
There is no pat answer. If you were involved in something you view as righteous- speaking with your disfellowshipped daughter or supporting a decision to give blood to your child, but even disagreeing with some stupid doctrine like "overlap" - then you might want them to kick you out so you can show family how they are.
If you need some kind of closure and desire to quit before they fire you, you know the rest.
In reality, it's only personal semantics nowadays. To dubs, it's the same.
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tracylee
I disassociated myself. For me, it was like telling the congregation that I left on MY TERMS, not because I did anything wrong. I'm sure they would have found a reason to disfellowship me anyway, but with DFing, it makes it seem like I'm the one who screwed up somehow. With disassociating myself, I made it clear that I CHOSE to no longer be a part of the cult.
It mattered personally to me because of the politics of the congregation I was in, but in the end it really doesn't matter who broke up with whom.
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EntirelyPossible
Do you want to jump or be pushed off the edge of the cliff?
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scooterspank
Hi tracylee, I'm another Tracy........ Good for you!!! I can't believe the things they were saying about you (mentioned in another thread). I admire your courage!
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tracylee
Hi Tracy aka Scooterspank!
My old congregation was full of crazies! For one thing, my family was already treated differently, being that we were immigrants, in a mostly white midwestern town, where everyone spoke to us in monosyllabic words like we didn't know English (insulting and annoying, I mean Jesus Christ, we've lived in the US for over 20 years! Chances are, we picked up on the language!) The rumors about me weren't even the worst of it. Being sexually assaulted AT the kingdom hall by a former Elder, and then being told they weren't going to do anything about it because it would cause a spectacle... that was beyond appalling to me.
I wish I had a copy of the letter I wrote to the PO when I DAed myself at 19. It was basically one very long angsty run-on sentence about no longer wanting to a part of their extremist sect. The best part was when the PO showed my mom what I wrote. Yep, he went and tattled on me to my mommy! LOL
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darth frosty
Do you want to jump or be pushed off the edge of the cliff?
An apt comparison. I say fug em, both options are just playing into their hands.
Give them no more power by playing their sick game.