Thanks Resistance is Futile. I have a better understanding of your situation now and see where you are coming from. All the best with your endeavours!
Advice needed about my study with a JW.
by Resistance is Futile 25 Replies latest jw friends
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Band on the Run
There is no evidence Peter was ever Bishop of Rome. Nada. I checked after a recent discussion.
Catholic legend looking backward is not sufficient. James was the big one as Jesus' brother. In fact, last night I read that we know they believed in a physical resurrection of Jesus was that James taught Jesus was God, rather than the community ditching Jesus and going for James. Just a thought. OT
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Black Sheep
It doesn't matter how long ago a teaching was last published. Unless the WT has contradicted it, he doesn't have many options.
Like I said, don't you bring it up, just ask questions that get him to bring it up. You want him to bring up, and then explain, doctrines that he is uncomfortable with, and that are contradicted historically, scientifically, logically etc..
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Anony Mous
Ask about benign things ever body knows like the flood and the scientific evidence for a flood 6000 years ago. Also ask if you can study the bible with him WITHOUT publications - it's impossible for them to do so, most likely he will reject your offer - and if he does, research the subject or scripture you will be talking about well in advance with sound, logical arguments. De-programming of a deep-in member is done by creating cognitive dissonance brought on by themselves.
Be careful how hard you go in however, we have a 'sister' in our hall that has developed what seems to be a form of schizophrenia due to it. I'm not diagnosing her, just how she acts and treats others in the congregation and how she acts and treats her children at home now after they disfellowshipped all her children, she seems to be able to pull these two worlds apart in her mind and justify both but behaves very erratic to the point where she is currently on meds and active psychiatric counseling.
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ABibleStudent
I already asked that one. I know firsthand that his family has been torn apart by this cultish practice. The response I got was a complete suppression of human emotions. I also saw the typical place the blame on the person who is no longer part of the group. "They left Jehovah. They want to sin. They want to live without rules." I got the impression that showing too much real emotion about the situation might imply a lack of faith in "God's ways". I do plan on bringing up the shunning policy again, but I imagine that's not a subject they feel very comfortable discussing with a potential convert.
Hi Resistance is Futile, I applaud you for spending time to help your family member. Have you read about the psychological techniques of mirroring, validating, and empathizing? If you haven't, you should read about mirroring, validating, and empathizing in Chapter 9 of “Getting the Love You Want – A Guide for Couples” by Harville Hendrix. An example leading in to your family member about shunning might go something like this:
I am having doubts about shunning family members and very close friends. Are you willing to talk more with me about your experiences?
Assuming he says yes, "(validating) I understand that you feel that your family member wanted to sin and they wanted to live without rules. (mirroring) It makes sense to want to help people not to sin. (empathizing) It must have been very difficult for you to not talk with your family member because the WTBTS said that they were disfellowshipped. (zinger) Where did Jesus say in the Bible to use disfellowship? Or, What were the sins that Paul said when disfellowship should be used? etc."
Resistance is Futile I hope that my examples will give you more ideas about helping your family member to be authentic instead of giving reflexsive WTBTS pre-programmed responses.
Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,
ABibleStudent
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ABibleStudent
Hi Resistance is Futile, I miss-labeled my example. This is a correction.
I am having doubts about shunning family members and very close friends. Are you willing to talk more with me about your experiences?
Assuming he says yes, "(mirroring) I understand that you feel that your family member wanted to sin and they wanted to live without rules. (validating) It makes sense to want to help people not to sin. (empathizing) It must have been very difficult for you to not talk with your family member because the WTBTS said that they were disfellowshipped. (zinger) Where did Jesus say in the Bible to use disfellowship? Or, What were the sins that Paul said when disfellowship should be used
Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,
ABibleStudent