I used to pray to Jehovah to kill me if I did 'IT' again.............you know.....'manipulate the sex organs to induce flow of semen' as the borg described it in an article written when I was a boy.....mid 60's-ish.
All this Awake did was pile on the guilt & told us we should tell the elders & damned fool that I was, I did just that.
I told the cong overseer I needed to see him about something & he arranged a time for me to call round to his house. I was crapping myself as I hid behind the hedge around his front garden trying to pluck up courage to go in. I knew I had to, otherwise I would never be able to please JEHOVAH because of my 'secret sin'..........(even though God knew all about it, so it wasn't that secret, was it?)
Eventually I numbed my mind & walked to his front door. He welcomed me in & his wife went into the kitchen, though I'm sure she heard what I told him as it was only in the next room. I imagine now I'm older, he had a pretty good idea what was coming as I opened up to him.
I expected a lot to happen than actually did happened after 'confessing my sin' to an older man appointed by god's holy spirit. It turned out to be a total waste of time as all that was offered were some kind words, offers to work with me in the FS & a promise that he would look out some more information from the borg for me to read.
He never did find anything else for me read even though I asked him many times.
The borg has really screwed young minds up over masturbation..........a perfectly NORMAL part of life.
A valuable lesson was learned though, NEVER RELY ON ELDERS..........AND NEVER RELY ON GOD!
Hoab