I remember organizing football and hockey ggames between brothers. It was very frustrating.
When and how did the GB start cracking down on the dubs social life?
by highdose 44 Replies latest jw friends
-
-
designs
The first things I saw as major interference in the late 60s was No college and Banning Congregation Sponsored Picnics, the last was actually more shocking because we had really great Congregation Picnics and Beach Parties. I was to young to know what that type of controlling oversight really meant.
-
Quentin
Perhaps the society is prepping the r & f for life in paridise.....
-
JeffT
When I was absorbed in 1973 the feeling of community was a major attraction. I might not have become a dub without it. I guess we should be glad they stopped it.
-
LongHairGal
Alfred:
Thanks for revealing that tidbit of information. I always suspected that there was instruction from the paranoid guys at the top to put the squash on any socializing. Yes, they are very much afraid that any JWs getting together in a laid-back social setting might get loose lips and start talking about all the screwy things in the religion. Add alcohol and you have truth serum.
While the religion sees this restriction as a self-serving survival tactic for them, thus assuring (in their minds maybe) that fewer JWs will decide to leave the religion, the inhumane attitude will send certain other ones for the door. What about singles there who have next to no association?? The religion took away the last crumb or vestige of "pleasure" or socializing. Maybe it is just as well. Fewer decent people will stay there.
New Chapter:
I am laughing over this new "arrangement" for preparing meals whereby it has to be "elder approved". Well, then maybe they won't try to saddle poor single women in the congregation with the burden of feeding the CO. I know somebody this happened to and the elder who slammed them with this "privilege" didn't even have the decency to reach in his pocket and give $20 to this poor sister (on a fixed income) to go buy some food. They apparently are running out of people who will do this, so she got picked. She made sure she told him that this would never happen again.
When she told me this I was angry because I know how tight money is with her and how nervy the whole thing is. I am so glad I no longer attend because I would run in the other direction.
-
eva luna
I just took some time to reread Blondis's post
One thing that really gets me is being treated like I'm dumb. You dont have to tell me the added risks of having a big party . Heck, I raised a flock of teenagers, I know what can happen.
As far as adults, it irratates me to hear I am responsible for any misbehavoir on their part.
Paul was a party poopper in general. Jesus made sure there was enough food and wine for the wedding guests.
To many rules makes your brain soft, as you are always referaing to them, that goes for your conscience too. I think Jesus was trying to make that point at times. Hmm.
I grew up in the 70's and it was fun. Full of pinic in the mountains or the beach. Snow trips in the winter. Kid costume parties. Rollerskating and even dance parties. I remember going to a friends house to get it ready for a dance party, and raking the lime green shag rug. LOL
To Pams Girl and New Chapter, The sisters were talking about getting together with each other and arranging meals, not someone doing this rouge. The sister that was most upset was new to the cong. and actually an elders wife. She said the reason why the elders needed to be asked first was to make sure the person/family that were recieving the food, were deserving and or in good standing. This is what I heard that day, and I cant say if this is a new rule. I just thought it was sad. That it was making sisters nervous about being loving, and indirectly letting them know what the elders thought of certain families/people.
-
LongHairGal
Eva Luna:
So, they want to be sure that the persons/familty receiving the food are "deserving and in good standing" do they??
While I can understand some of the logic behind this (because there are deadbeats looking for freebies), the other logic is that they will only feel that somebody who is a "pioneer" is deserving. What this would mean is: people like me who work full time (and criticized for it) would be the last ones to ever get help. This is the catch 22 situation there. This is why I made sure the users there never got the right time out of me.
This is all a moot point because I am a "fader" but this is what somebody like me would face if I were still there.
-
NewChapter
Long Hair Girl: Oh please don't get me started on the many tiimes I was slammed financially or otherwise! I was mostly single as a dub with a great job and lots of extra money. It seems the brothers felt that gave them the right to "volunteer" me to spend money helping others---and OH THE RIDES! It seems since I had no family, I couldn't turn down the constant pressure to give rides. And I loved the people, I really did, but I would be tired after work---have to leave a half hour earlier to provide a ride---go to a public housing area that specialized in people with physical and mental disabilities---and I ALWAYS got the mentals---and have to deal with that surreal ride.
I remember an elder telling a sister, without much money and kids to take care of, about the merchandise that Stoops sells. Of course she was interested--what dub isn't--and I opened my mouth and said yeah I ordered stuff from them. Well the elder encouraged this sister to think about what she wanted. She thought of a list and he turned to me and said you can take care of that. So I ended up ordering her stuff, paying for it, and never getting reimbursed. She didn't offer, I didn't ask. This elder knew she wasn't in a position to pay, so I know he knew what he was doing. Look, it didn't break me, I just didn't like being taken advantage of.
NC
Edited: sorry that was a bit off topic.
-
LongHairGal
New Chapter:
If you were single with a great job and extra money you were seen as a walking ATM machine who was there to do never-ending favors for users and ingrates. Hopefully, life is better now that you are out of there. Yes, it was a lesson learned for us all.
Unfortunately, that is what this religion is all about: EXPLOITATION. It is not just about a door-to-door ministry, it is about a little fiefdom and hierarchy of people trying to get what they can and targeting whoever they can. One can only wonder just how corrupt and horrible this religion would become if it were around for a very long time or if it were geographically isolated.
If you are a woman you are twice as likely to be victimized. If you don't know how to say NO you will be three times more likely to be victimized.
These bastards didn't like me because I had their number and I stayed on the fringes. When that 1995 changed generation teaching came out and I felt it was basically over as far as I was concerned, I was determined from that point forward to work alone and come and go quietly. My friends were few and I mean FEW. But, I didn't care. I saw the handwriting on the wall and was determined to protect myself. I finally started my "fade" the end of 2000.
-
moshe
Responsibility is what killed it. Even though they were informal events, as I recall (elder days) if the activity was announced or posted in the KH, the KH or the Society could be liable for an accident. Then even the informal ones were bad, because it wasn't announced, brothers got left out and found out later, so then they got mad- dagnabit, somebody got upset about something at those recreational parties/picnics, so they just stopped doing them at our KH.