Would This Be Assault?

expatbrit

OK, let's construct a hypothetical situation.

This year I will not be attending the memorial. Up till now, the elders have left me alone, but not attending the memorial may well trigger a reaction. So, let's say the following happens:

One Saturday afternoon the door bell goes. My (JW) wife answers, and two elders march in. They say that they are here to visit my wife and see how she is doing.

My reaction will be to see who it is calling, grunt at them, and then return to what I am doing. Let's assume I return to reading a book in my den.

Now, after the elders have drunk my tea and stuffed their faces with my chocolate-chunk cookies, one of them comes upstairs and into my den. He snoops a bit at the books and my travel souvenirs on the shelves. While he is doing this, I use my Englishperson gland to suck all the heat out of the room rendering the atmosphere somewhere close to absolute zero.

This doesn't make a difference however. (Of course not, one of the qualifications for being an elder is to be oblivious to what's going on around you.) So, Mr. elder plonks down in the other chair in my den and starts to interogate me on "how I feel about the Truth".

I will not answer these questions. My firmly held position is that these people have no power over me unless I give it to them. So, I tell him that I do not wish to discuss this subject at this time, and since I'm in the middle of something, to please leave the room.

Let's say he doesn't go. A lot of elders have this strange attitude that they own all the property of publishers in their congregation. Let's say he continues to pester me after my polite, and then not so polite refusals.

What are my options now? I could remove myself and lock myself in the bathroom, but I'll be damned if I'll act like a scared rabbit in my own damn house! Or I could call the police. But let's be real. No police people are going to leave the donut shop in anything under 3 hours for something trivial like this.

That leaves the physical option. I'm 6 feet 1 inch, 180 pounds and free of physical ailments. The local elders are either considerably older, shorter, or have no balls.

So, let's imagine that I grab this elder by the lapels, push him down the stairs and kick his ass out the front door with a "piss off and never darken my doorstep again" comment. If the other elder doesn't leave voluntarily, he gets the same treatment.

Now, the question is: have I just committed assault?

Can they charge me, and will the charge stick? Or can I argue that I was removing an intruder from my property? Do elders have guidelines from the society on what to do if this happens?

Comments and tips on effective Vulcan Death-grips appreciated!

Expatbrit

Mindchild

You might not only have to worry about assault charges in that scenario but kidnapping as well. Yes, because anytime you physically restrain someone or force them to go to another location is technically kidnapping.

You are in your rights in asking them to leave but don't get physical or make any kind of physical threats, as that is verbal assault. If someone does not leave after you plainly insist that they do, call the cops and file a trespassing complaint.

Personally, I would simply take the offensive and wouldn't even allow someone to come into your private area. I would simply say politely, that I didn't want company or don't want to be disturbed. If they persist after hearing something like that, you can ask them if they have a hearing problem or don't understand what they said and repeat it. They can only take offense at their own stupidity then and leave.

Oh, maybe you might just want to keep a few blue Smurfs around for protection...lol.

Hope this helps.

Skipper

safe4kids

Assault? Probably, but don't worry...I'll bake ya a cake with a file in it

Dana

jayhawk1

I had to do this cut and past from the Elder's handbook. This section is directed to Elders, when an Elder needs a good talking to.

Proper Attitude When Being Counseled

Listen carefully.

Do not feel sorry for yourself and thereby miss benefiting
from the good counsel being given.

Jesus admonished his disciples to get the sense of instruc-
tion. (Matt. 13:51,52; 15:10)

Accept the counsel with gratitude, and do not try to
justify or excuse yourself. (Heb. 12:5-7)

Appreciate the Bible-based discipline received as from
Jehovah. (2 Tim. 3:16, 17)

A humble and receptive attitude toward counsel will
help you to be diligent in applying it.

Apply the counsel given; the benefits are great. (Prov. 3:
7, 8; 4:13; 19:20)

88 "Pay Attention to Yourselves and to All the Flock "

You could remind them that they must listen to councel too. Then proceed with your own style of counceling, which could include kicking their A$$. Then if the cops show up, you could just say you were counceling them on what happens if they don't stay out of your home.

Is this a light saber in my pocket or am I just happy to see you?

"Hand me that whiskey, I need to consult the spirit."-J.F. Rutherford

Commie Chris

If you have told him to leave and he refuses, he is trespassing. The law allows you to use "reasonable force" to evict a trespasser. You can't beat the crap out of him, but you can take him firmly by the lapel and escort him to the door. As long as you use no more force than is reasonable in the circumstances, after he has refused to leave, you will be OK.

LB

Well I'm not sure about Canadian laws, but here in Oregon if you bitchslap an elder it's assault every time.

Never Squat With Yer Spurs On

bigboi

LOL @ LB

waiting

Howdy expatbrit,

Before you leave for your study, announce pleasantly that you're participating in a Private Detective course, and part of that is taping conversations. Tell them you'll be practicing in your den - and if they care to join you, let them be forewarned that they will be taped, and the tape reviewed for a class project with your class.

That way, you've also put them on notice ahead of time.

If your wife questions you later, you could say you kept it *private* from her as you want to be a *Private* Detective.

I use my Englishperson gland to suck all the heat out of the room rendering the atmosphere somewhere close to absolute zero.

You Englishpersons are so properly funny.

waiting

hey hey!

If you use Commie Chris 's suggestion along with mine - you could actually have a good time!

If you have told him to leave and he refuses, he is trespassing. The law allows you to use "reasonable force" to evict a trespasser

Tell them of your taping course (and start taping.)

Ask them to leave after enjoying your tea & cookies.

Leave the room.

If they follow, *usher* the elders off your property - with words for the tape.

Of course, your wife may deliver that same icy cold Englishperson sucking air that you delivered ---- to you ----- for a long time.

waiting

Scully

Expatbrit:

You can always tell them that you've relocated your "library" to the shed out in the back yard. Once they've expressed interest in viewing it, lead them to the front door (who wants to trudge through the Canadian snow in your back yard, when you've got a pathway that leads there from the front?), help them on with their jackets and hold the door open. Once they're out, say "thanks for dropping by!"* and slam the door shut on them. If they don't leave post haste, then call the police on them, and say there are two adult males on the property who seem overly interested in your back yard tool shed. Wave "bye-bye" to them as they are escorted to the police cruiser.

*or alternatively, you might try my brother's favourite: "Thanks for the hostility, it's been a pressure!"

Love, Scully

In the desert things find a way to survive. Secrets are like this too. They work their way up through the sands of deception so men can know them. - The X Files

Would This Be Assault?

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