Should cult members be allowed to adopt or be foster parents?

by Mad Sweeney 44 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  AGuest

  You, personally, are always the exception to the rule,

  I don't think so, dear JO (again, peace to you!). I mean, I would be lying (and so would everyone else) if I said that ALL JWs were/are "bad" PEOPLE. I wasn't... and being a JW never took precedence over my trying to be a "decent" person. When I read the verses about looking after the "fatherless boy" I took it to heart. And I knew other "sisters" who did, as well. Needless to say, most of us are no longer JWs... but we were at the time. (Although, thinking back on it, none of the husbands were JWs or elders/MSs, so maybe that played a part - I dunno...).

  I think we'd all be more correct if we asked, "Should an overly fanatic, to the point of being mentally/emotionally/psychologically abusive JW be allowed to adopt or foster a child?" To which I would vehemently respond, "HECK, NO!" But I would make the same response as to a mentally/emotionally/psychologically abusive non-JW.

  The point is, what is best for the child... NOW. At least as far as foster care is concerned and I'm not sure I'd think any different regarding adoption.

  Again, some of you here were raised JWs, yes. And have/are reaping some very negative "benefits" from that. But I PROMISE you, every one of you... that being raised in a NON-JW home is not necessarily all peaches and cream EITHER. You can choose to blame your parents for your adult angsts and (self-perceived) deficiencies... but you're not alone. MOST people blame their parents in this way. JW and non-JW.

  Parents can suck. Really. Regardless of what they believe... or do not believe.

  Again, peace to you!

  YOUR servant and a slave of Christ,

  SA
• 

  journey-on

  I had wonderful JW parents. Yeah, they allowed me to marry extremely young and I was indoctrinated and made to drink the kool-aid, but they were good and loving parents. My mother, especially, was loving and kind-hearted, although she could be tough as nails when it was necessary. She was also very smart, and I think she was pulled emotionally and mentally many times in her life due to conflicts I know she had. But, she would never renounce the religion, but she never shunned my brothers either. She would have made an excellent foster mother.....another exception to the rule.
• 

  james_woods

  They are merely misguided and to limit their activities in society based on their belief system would allow for atrocious activities to take place (such as the Fox audience calling to kill all non-Christians in the US).

  I have one simple question: What in the hell are you talking about???

  That sounds like you are more a cult member than the branch Davidians.
• 

  EmptyInside

  Foster/adoptive parents should be qualified based on a number of factors,not just religious.

  I know a Witness family who adopted a son. They had biological children too. They were a popular and well-like family in the circuit. All the kids knew more than one language and were able to play more than one musical instrument. They seemed quite happy.

  The adoptive son,didn't stay a Witness,but he is married and seems to be doing well.

  Now,I know of another case,where the elders wouldn't even give a reference to the adoptive agency. They knew the marriage was on the rocks. But,this sister wanted a daughter. Before she was a Witness she fried her brain on drugs. When she became a Witness,totally fanactical,everything is demonized,etc. She made her adoptive daughter read the whole book of Revelation before she was allowed to play outside.

  She had a biological son,and she screwed him up just as bad.

  So,each one should be taken on a case by case basis.
• 

  Buster

  I adopted my daughter many years ago long after I left the dubbies She had (has) two biological sisters from her birth mother.

  The two sisters were adopted to another family. Amazingly, they went to a Mexican JW family in Massachusetts. These girls left the family early, because dear old padre was molesting the prettier of the two. Damn JWs.

  However, these kids in foster care or homes from which they must be removed need to go somewhere. They're in hell. On average, being adopted into a JW family is probably better than where they are coming from.
• 

  AGuest

  each one should be taken on a case by case basis.

  'N dat's allz ah'm sayin', dear EI (peace to you!). Nohmsayin'?

  Peece!

  A slave of Christ,

  SA
• 

  cult classic

  I know several JW families who have adopted and fostered children. If you ignore the religion, they do as well as the next family. I think it depends on the individual family and child. As we know, not all witnesses are "on it" so to speak, so the damage to the child would be minimal (from a cult perspective).

  P.S. There was actually an article (Awake! I think) years ago that featured about 3 or 4 witness families and their adoptions. I'll have to look up the reference. Adoption was cast in a favorable light.
• 

  White Dove

  My cousin was adopted and so were a couple of girls into a different family.

  To adopt children into any cult, noooooooo!
• 

  cult classic

  ^^^ I meant to say the damage could be minimized.
• 

  still thinking

  There are so many good foster parents out there, and so many bad ones...The same applies to JW parents. I don't think you can have a blanket ban on JW's. It has to be on a case by case basis.

  I have friends who were fostered and adopted by NON JW foster parents who were physically and verbally abused. In the end, how do you really know what someone will be like in their own home. These are the risks of fostering...but as long as there is a need in society...the risks will continue.

  I was adopted by my grandparents, and in foster care as a young baby....my grandfather was a violent alcoholic who was sectioned when I was eight years old. I personally was never physically abused by him, but my mother (grandmother) was and I witnessed a lot of it. Should I have been put in a different home? Possibly. Do I now wish that I had been? NO. They were my family and I still loved them.

  It really isn't a straight forward issue....every case has to be looked at on its own merrits. Including JW families.