Lurkers I clearly asked mankkeli how to stop my brain from thinking. How to shut it off. How to not think and just do what I am told. How to forget about all the hurt I have been through and all mankkeli had to offer me was to think of the suffering Job went through and mankkeli was sure that if he/she had been there I would be still in the "truth" because mankkeli would have seen to it.
This is in fact what mankkeli wrote in response to my question (I wish I had met you in the middle of this distress, your story could have be re-written differently, infact you would have remained and moved on perfectly well. When you realised that things were no longer adding up in the organisation all you could have done is to slow down or limit your participation momentarily, It is just a reminder that you need to take things easy, we often get exhausted and feel tired even in our secular obligations and all that is needed to bounce back is to get refreshment and reshuffle where needed, not a sudden withdrawal or an inaugauration of attack on the organisation.)
Now I know I am bad at spelling but mankkeli is worse in my book but anyway, what is mankkeli talking about? Mankkeli never answered my question of how to shut off my mind to quit thinking and to be able to just go with the flow, to be able to keep going door to door now know what I do about the religion and its background. How do you do I shut my mind off and not think when I see with my own eyes child molesters going door to door? When I have elders lying to my face? When I have learned the real truth about the "truth" who do I turn that part of my brain off and keep going door to door without thought for what I am doing.
Mankkeli is obsessed with Stephen Hassen, Ray Franz and Richard Dawkin's. He keep throwing their names out like we here on JWN are worshiping them. Like mankkeli wrote to me here (You need to remind yourself that Stephen Hassan would use all techniques at his disposal to diagnose your situation and come up with a syndrome that will make you rely on him. Stephen pays his bills by convincing you that you are in a cult, so that you can buy his books and keep his business running. I'm not attacking him neither I am underminning his effort, I am only explainning the reality in clear terms.)
Where in the world did that come from? I never mentioned that I was a following of Stephen Hassan nor did I mention that I even read his books all I did was ask why he was so obsessed with him and mankkeli gave me no clear answer but to throw that out. All mankkeli is doing is throwing straw men at us to try to distract us to confuse us.
Mankkeli never answered my question as to the lives of Charles Taze Russell or Judge Rutherford. He said that Richard Dawkin's and Stephen Hassen do not have exemplary lives. OK I do not know either way as I have not read up on them but I do know about the lives of the founders of my religion and their lives were not ones I ever would want to live or be part of. Charles Taze Russell had a horrible marriage and he delved in the spirit world way too much for my taste but that is all over looked now because as they now say 'that was way in the past and it is all old light.' OK even if it is way in the past and it is old light now in todays times that still does change that it happened and it is what our religion was founded on. Charles Taze Russell would not be someone I would seek out in my life yet I have lived his mission most of my life by following the religion he started. Really Jehovah came to earth and saw a man who had a horrible marriage, and was involved with the spirit world and Jehovah said to himself "there's a man who I can work with to do my will?" It truly makes no sense with all the people in this world who were living good lives at the time with good solid marriages Jehovah picked Charles Taze Russell out of everyone that was available to choose from at the time? OK even if Jehovah did pick Russell what about Judge Rutherford? Oh my word where do you even start there. Talk about a man who could not keep a marriage mankkeli here is your man. He loved to drink as was well known at Bethel by many so if you truly have a mind and will really do the work of knowing who founded the Jehovah's Witnesses not just reading what they themselves write or what the mentally diseased apostates say, but to really use your mind and do your own research like you mankkeli has suggested we do on Richard Dawkin's, Stephen Hassen and Ray Franz. Why do you lurkers not do the same research on the founders of your religion.
Mankkeli has been slamming Ray Franz saying he died because of his leaving the truth and he spent his whole life after leaving in fighting the religion. Ray died really because of being old just like everyone of us will when they get to be his age, just like all the GB have done who were supposed to never die until this new light has come to be with the overlapping generation. mankkeli why are you not ranting about Ted Jaracz dying, he was of the generation that was never supposed to die at the cover of the May 15th 1984 Watchtower says. And OK so what is the point mankkeli about Ray all you are trying to do is to throw another straw man out there trying to get us to believe Ray died a broken man. Yes Ray wanted to know why he had believed the way he did, what person would not want to understand it who has a mind and is able to use it. Yes Ray fought to stay in the religion; I think most of us did. I know I did, I had a horrible time believing that this was not the "truth." I so wanted it to all just be true to keep on believing that I would not have to die. To keep my blinders on. To keep believing that I could live forever. That I would not go to high school or get married or have kids but now I am old enough to be a grandmother. I so clearly remember being in grade school and being told that I would never make high school in this system. It is hard to come to grips with the fact that it was not true and it clearly was not true because like I said I could now be a grandmother and all the people on the cover of that May 15th Watchtower are now dead. Just like little kids that still want to keep believing that there is a Santa Claus or the Ester Bunny, I wanted to keep believing I was going to be able to live forever and not die.
I did throw myself back into the meetings, I prayed more, studied more, I threw myself into the feild service more but I could not get my brain to stop thinking. How do I do that mankkeli?
Ray Franz was on a much higher level in the "truth" then I ever was, so for him to want to try to understand what he had given his life for is wrong? At least it is according to you mankkeli from what you have written.
And this thing mankkeli has about Stephen Hassen wanting us to follow him. Where in the world is that coming from, answer me mankkeli. You said to quote you again (Stephen pays his bills by convincing you that you are in a cult, so that you can buy his books and keep his business running. I'm not attacking him neither I am underminning his effort, I am only explainning the reality in clear terms.)
Well the reality in clear terms mankkeli is that Stephen Hassen has never asked me or anyone I know to buy his books or brow beat me or anyone I know into feeling huge guilt for not reading his books and promoting his beliefs. Yet the religion of Jehovah's Witnesses had me filling up my gas tank ever day to pioneer, taking a vow of poverty when I was at Bethel, and giving up my time to sell the Watchtower and Awakes plus books door to door all for free, not having children because as Mark13:17 says "Woe to the pregnant women." Stephen never told me not to have children to not go to school becaus the end of this system was so close.
Mankkeli you said to me (When you realised that things were no longer adding up in the organisation all you could have done is to slow down or limit your participation momentarily, It is just a reminder that you need to take things easy, we often get exhausted and feel tired even in our secular obligations and all that is needed to bounce back is to get refreshment and reshuffle where needed, not a sudden withdrawal or an inaugauration of attack on the organisation.)
Where is that in writing from the Faithful Slave? Give me the resource that you are taking this from. And you assumed that I did a sudden withdrawal or an inaugauration what is that word? I do not get what that word means, but you said I did an attack on the organization by the way you really do need to use spell check. Who told you I did an attack on the organization. I have boxes of correspondence between myself the elders in my hall, Bethel, the CO and DO all before I ever found sight.
You said you have read most of the posters comments and threads have you read my post number 1118.
I did my research and used the brain Jehovah gave me. So again I ask you my question that you did not answer how do I shut my mind off I would really like a answer not some stupid straw men.
LITS
Oh also at least I say I am sorry for my bed spelling