by talesin 76 Replies latest watchtower scandals
I wonder how many posters here are not only in recovery from spiritual abuse (JWS) , but other traumas,, such as sexual and physical abuse,,, or rape as a young person (ie, child or teen).
How many of us are recovering from double - or triple - trauma ... ?
Anyone want to share?
And how much does growing up JW, as well as having these other traumas,,, affect your healing, and / or afterlife?
t
Thank goodness my meeting shirts were long sleeve and I wore a sport coat, otherwise the welts on my back, arms and legs would show from the times I got beat before the meeting.
I cannot even begin to count the times that my Presiding Overseer Father told me that he hated me, wished I weren't his son, called me worthless, useless etc. or my Mother calling me a sissy, queer, rag doll, dish rag, marshmallow, etc.
Somewhat sexual abuse entailed me having to get on my knees in front of my mother while she was laying on her stomach with her wearing only panties, not even a bra, and me having to "Rub" her all over her body, including between her legs and her butt. She always wanted her butt concentrated on. Fortunately I never had to touch her vaginal lips directly, but I was able to see plenty while I was down there rubbing her and I learned female anatomy at a very young age. Thankfully, shortly after turning 16 I didn't have to rub her anymore.
My Mother would do really weird things to me while growing up that would make a person cringe, but I am not able to get into much detail unless I know someone really well.
(((((((ohiocowboy))))))))
Your story makes me cry. I wish you had a real mother who could have loved and nourished you like you deserved.
To ohio cowboy I'm typing through tears for you. How parents could treat their own flesh and blood as yours did is beyond any rational thought. The people children depend on to love , nurture and protect are their parents. You did nothing to deserve this. Here is a hug from a mama(((((((((Ohio cowboy)))))))) How are you doing now? When and how did you leave the cult? Do you have any contact with these monsters now? All my best to you.
Dammit, OC,,,,, I knew you were an empathetic person,,, but I didn't know where it came from ... now that I do,,, just all I can say,,, is Love Yas!
been there,,, and dammit,,, thank you for sharing such hard stuff. it's what we need ,,,,,,,,, and well, 'nuff said.
Okay, truth about myself .... raped at age 8 and given an STD... beaten with many welts from the belt till I was 14,, and what my brother did to me,,, I dont't remember most so I can't go there...
Thank you, OC, for being so brave ... we can only tell our stories when we have the support of others ....
((((((oc))))))
tal
ps... now I know why my bff the rabbit, loves you so much ...
xo
tal
as I said earlier,, stick a fork in me, I'm done,,, at least for 2nite,,, got 2 get some sleep..
love u all,,,
tal
I've had the pleasure of meeting ohiocowboy, and he's a wonderful guy.
My mom also liked to do weird stuff, except she liked to give me enemas and douches constantly as a small child. I was also beaten often, with a belt, a paddle, most of the time it was a willow switch - and we had to go get it too, if it wasn't a good one we got it worse. I was isolated from other children from the time I was an infant until I was school aged, just my brothers and sisters. The people at the hall didn't really associate with us that much. My mom was fanatical and loved telling me horrible stories about what Jehovah would do to me because I was so evil. We were yelled at, screamed, at, constantly belittled and told we were nothing because anything we could do well was not due to us but was only Jehovah working through us. I was the third child of 7, my oldest brother was 7 years older, he was a bully. My next older brother was 3 years older and he liked the psychological warfare better. He contstantly played head games, and constantly told me that no one liked me. I was taught I was lower than snail slime, that no one loved me, that I would grow up to be killed at armegeddon because I could not play the witness games right.
What you get from all of this is PTSD. And for those of us that just built walls to shut out the pain and humiliation, it does come back later in life to haunt you. To this day I'm socially awkward and don't really know how to have relationships. I have worked very hard to forgive my parents, didn't go into details with my dad, mostly he left it up to mom, but when he did wade in it was with fists.
Of course I grew up to marry an abusive man, and when I told my dad how badly he treated me (he was an elder by the way), his comment was - "what did you do to make him treat you that way?"
The good thing that came of this is, I survived it. I have spent a lot of time healing. And I chose not to raise my son in this manner. He's a good kid and I'm proud of him.
(((Ohio))) I feel your pain, brother!
I remember a friend telling me in the early 70's that Kissinger was a pedophile. She knew him personally. She also hated him. I just filed it away, although I was shocked. She did not percivorate on the subject, only mentioned it in passing. Years later I heard others say the same thing. Today I'm told he dosen't leave the country because some countries would actually arrest him.
My old friend said when "they" met for dinner, most of the inner circle, those without thier wives in attendence anyways would leave with hot young women, Kissinger always left with young boys. This was the Nixon clan. I never really "believed" nor repeated what she rambled on about at times...but many years later I began to hear the same allegations over and over by those who had no contact with her.
I think we should guard our kids carefully.
