Where in the BIble does it say Adultery Must involve Penetration?

by BrendaRob 28 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  Larsinger58

  Welcome! I don't know if this helps, and it is clear the rules are not standardized, but I'll relate how a similar situation was handled, though the wife's behavior instigated it.

  A very attractive wife was married to an unbeliever but found a man whom she met in field service whom she decided was the ideal mate and decided she wanted to marry him, which she eventually did. But she knew her husband well and his infidelities so withheld sexual favors from him, knowing quite well he'd likely get it elsewhere. So she had a close friend in the truth follow him. She had the same task as you to "prove" adultery. But the elders told her that if he was alone with this woman and in her house and the "lights went out" then she could get a divorce. She didn't have to prove they had sex, only the reasonable presumption. Now they probably did have sex, but all that seemed to be required by the elders was his being alone with her and the light going out. He was devastated to have been found out and that his wife was divorcing him. She got the divorce and promptly married her Bible Study once he got baptized.

  Oh, and in another case, where an elder was guilty of fondling only several different women, the elder was disfellowshipped. But no technical fornication took place. The wife, though claimed he betrayed her in his heart. The elders told her even though he was disfellowshipped, though, since there was no formal "adultery" she could not divorce him. She, however, basically told the elders to take a hike and divorced him anyway. There was little the elders could do. And later she married another brother and their marriage was accepted, whatever.

  So it just depends. Like someone said, hang around and the horror stories will amaze you!

  LS
• 

  designs

  Sorry you are going through this. If this other person has called your home there should be a way to have that record and find out who it is. I haven't been an Elder for 22 years but back in the 80s we had to have proof like walking out of a motel room kind of thing. Think about a private detective service if it comes to that. By all means seek some couples counseling or private counseling to get through this tough period.

  I'm surprised the panties in the briefcase didn't get your husband bounced as an Elder, must have Elder buddies who wish they had something going on.
• 

  trueblue

  IT'S SIMPLE POUND THE NAIL INTO THE TREE TRUNK WITH ONE SWING. . . . USING THE BALL END OF THE HAMMER ~ CHECK IT OUT!

  It is a bunch of garbage this JW's think they devorce court or something draging on for eternety, always talking about things from long ago when they haven't a clue what it is all about... I wish my Mother had stayed with my father and one of us boys would have took care of him, and my sister and brother would still be alive too, not to mention it being worse than death for my Mother, but who cares, they just want to sell magazines...

  What did the motorcycle rider say when his wheel fell off? You picked a fine time to leave me loose wheel. remember the song you picked a fine time to leave me Lucel, by Kenny Rogers?
• 

  sinis

  What the hell are you doing going to a THIRD PARTY for advice????? Jesus, Christ, the situation is between you and your husband, and God, if you believe in god. NO ONE ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!! if you can forgive your husband, then fine, that stays between you and him, no need to air the laundry with strangers that have no business knowing your personal life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• 

  blondie

  Actually the WTS teaches that all they have to prove is have 2 eyewitnesses that a man and a woman (not married to each other) stayed overnight together unchaperoned to have proof to df.
• 

  charlie brown jr.

  It all comes down to how Popular or How much Pull your Elder Husband has........

  The Hall can be the Like Big Goverment....... Coverups ect...

  I've seen it 1st hand... Some Who Committed Really Horrible Acts and Nothing Happens..

  Others got Put threw Hell on Stupid Things!
• 

  james_woods

  Also in their twisted belief, if you had sex with him again after the evidence, none of the evidence counts any more.
• 

  tec

  Welcome BrendaRob.

  The only reason this is even an issue is because you have given them (the elders, the GB, the WTS) power over you. If you're worried about what they think about you, then you go to them for permission for... whatever. In this case, perhaps obtain a scriptural divorce. But if you give that power only to Christ, then HE knows whether or not it is true, and His approval (or forgiveness in some other situation) is the only one you need concern yourself with. Then you answer only to Him (in spiritual matters), and no one else.

  And of course, the bible does not say that adultery must involve penetration. Christ's words should be enough to show that adultery is more than that. If someone's spouse is involved with another person and does everything else, including give their love and loyalty to them before their spouse, then we all would consider ourselves having been cheated on. Because the betrayal of promises is real.

  Peace and strength to you,

  Tammy
• 

  EntirelyPossible

  Can you say you went swimming if you just went splashing around in the wading pool?

  **Edited to add, I did not read the OP**
• 

  undercover

  Elder bodies can be some of the biggest "good ole boys" clubs around. They're no different than the corrupt small town (or some big city) governments or organized crime syndicates.

  Especially if the wife is seen as a trouble maker or rabble rouser. That could mean that the wife was just one to speak her mind, call a spade a spade. This will not do in WT land. Women or to be seen and only heard when asked a question. And the answer is to uphold the position of the male authority without question. Let a strong-willed woman question authority, or accuse a brother, the good ole boys will rally 'round and protect their own.

  Even in halls with more balanced elder bodies, it's not so much about justice or disciplining the wrongdoing...it's about protecting the reputation of the congrgation and subsequently the organization. So any kind of scandal that could cause problems will be handled in a way that exposes the wrongdoer in the least light as possible. They may have to deal with the wrongdoing but it will be in a way that protects the organization, not in a way that satisfies, or protects, those that have been wronged.

  As bad as infidelity is, imagine the horror of a child abuser in the congregation. If they won't sit up and take positive action against such evil, do you really think they're gonna take measures to deal with something as seemingly insignificant as a cheating spouse?