Question... Does an elder lose his privileges if his 18 year old son stops attending the KH?

by Alfred 43 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  Alfred

  I'm starting to get a clearer picture of what's been happening with my nephew who has recently decided that he no longer wishes to be a part of "The Lie"... it appears that my nephew may have been forced to move out by his elder father who was afraid of possibly losing his privileges by having a non-believing son under his roof. That is the impression I'm getting by talking to my sister (his aunt who is not a JW).

  While I try to figure this out... does anyone know if that is a valid possibility in general? I'm referring to the possibility of an elder losing his privileges because his son no longer wishes to be a JW but still lives under the same roof... any insight by recently faded elders would be much appreciated...

  thanks
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  Knowsnothing

  It is, because of a scripture to hold your own household down.

  1 Timothy3

  4 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full [a] respect. 5 (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)
• 

  Alfred

  Knowsnothing...

  Thanks... that's what I thought... just couldn't remember that scripture...

  It really annoys me that my brother in law is more concerned about losing his privileges than losing his own son... just goes to show how sick this religion is...
• 

  cedars

  It depends whether his son (your nephew) was ever baptized or not. If he is baptized, stops attending meetings and ends up being disfellowshipped on the grounds of apostasy, then it COULD affect his father's position. Page 36 of Shepherd the Flock of God prescribes reviewing an elder's qualifications if "members of the brother's household are involved in serious wrongdoing", which could obviously include apostasy.

  If your nephew ISN'T baptized, then it should make no difference whatsoever to his father's qualifications. Hell, if the Society got rid of every elder with an unbelieving child, there wouldn't be many elders left.

  Cedars
• 

  BluesBrother

  A valid possibility ? Well, in my experience it is a maybe....

  Of course I have out of the loop for a few years , but our old P O had a son who not only stopped but got d/f'd. Dad remained as P O . Apparently the BOE could see that he had done all he could to bring him up in the way that they wanted ...and Dad was a popular guy, so no question of removal.

  I knew another elder in the same position whose daughter did the same and he voluntarily stepped down.

  I think that there are always more complicated family issues and tensions involved. And also with the BOE, if they do not like the elder much they can use it as a lever to give him the boot
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  Alfred

  Thanks Cedars... he got baptized at 13 or 14.... as far as I know, other than dating a non-JW recently , he has done nothing wrong and doesn't face disfellowshipping (that I am aware of)...
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  Alfred

  Thanks Blues brother... seems there are grey areas that are played with depending on the elder's reputation... it's not as cut and dry as I had imagined...
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  cedars

  In that case, yes his father is right to be worried. However, so long as he can demonstrate that he has done everything that he can to keep his son on the straight and narrow, AND so long as your nephew keeps his head down and executes a successful fade WITHOUT being accused of apostasy, then his Dad has nothing to worry about.

  It's really that simple.

  Cedars
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  Knowsnothing

  To be fair, Alfred, your BIL probably has pressure to remain an elder due to lack of elders (are lack of elders a problem in his area?)

  Still, it is sad that the religion prompts people to put the religion over their families first. Sad indeed.
• 

  DesirousOfChange

  If your nephew ISN'T baptized, then it should make no difference whatsoever to his father's qualifications. Hell, if the Society got rid of every elder with an unbelieving child, there wouldn't be many elders left.

  An elder with teenagers (or older) at home who are not dunked is scrutinized severely. But as with everything else, it all depends on if you are popular or not. ANYTHING can be rationalized away. "He did his best and that's all that can be expected. All his other kids are in the Truth. Even Jehovah failed and lost some of His children."

  DOC