now wat??

xtreemlyconfused17

aloha everyone...................please do help if u can. Hope u dont get bored reading this quite long text i'l soon be 17, i'm an unbaptized publisher, but innactive (havent gone door to door)for more than a year, but still very strict with Our organisation's standards (lyk no teenage dating). recently i've been discoverin loota shit. One minute u feel lyk in heaven, soo peaceful, from the bad guys, having wonderful hopes..........then the other u find out that ur under d devils seat himself!!!!! N the 'wonderful hopes'?? Perished in thin air. Its freakin scarey if u were a 'zelous' JW so these two weeks i've been going through 'big dady's forbiden materials....a.k.a 'apostates' sites. It was very shocking for me i cant explain. This unusual fear just grew in me and i reealy have trouble sleeping at nite. I once woke up in d midddle of the night crying and my mom had to work things out. I told her about wat i've been reading, about the ex-bethelites experiences, ex-elders, d disfelowshiped...........(i didnt want to talk about the governing body at the time)...........n i knew what to expect from her as i'm a JW too........mum was like 'u know we are not supose to read anything involved with the apostates, y did u? I should take ur phone from u. Just look at urself now' i was very emotional at the time so that was it with mum. so i had found out this Barbara Anderson.....this Fred Franz........these sites where ex bethelites talked of their 'very sad and unfair' experiences..........the 'forever changing doctrines'........the 1914 fiction.........the apostle Pauls 'personal opinions guiding christians' (WHICH IS D BIGGEST BLOW TO ME cuz thats like the foundation of everything)................ ITS MINDBLOWING!!!!! But i read somewhere thats its normal to be shocked so now am not surprised that i cant sleep at night. Lol but now what?? I had rested my everythng on this 'Gods Organisation'!!! I aaaalways dreamnt of having kids......raising them to be one of Jahs people......NOW WAT??? I Cannot think of any other religion i could raise my kids in!!! N I SOOO DNT WANT TO BE A PAGAN.........SO NOW WAT???? Atleast now my consience will let me mary a non-JW (n definately not turn down teen dates offers nymore lol)...........but then where will i be going for worship? Atleast just on Sundays??? I still beleive in lots of WT teachings............BUT I HAAVE TO BUILD A FOUNDATION FOR MY FUTURE.......but i just dont 'fully' trust the WT anymore so i was seeking advice. What did u do?? If u left the organisation wher did u go to?? Anybody my age mates in here?? What r u going to do?? I would like to make friends too, so we share feelings n xperiences n PLANS, cuz its lyk i'm alone who knows 'the truth of the truth' in this gods forsaken country (Tanzania) what i'm doing now though is looking for proof first. I wrote down a number of questions (eg, do the anointed around the world communicate? Whch is the most correct year for the fall of Jerusalem? Where Paul's letters inspired by the holy spirit?), n handed them to my bible teacher and she handed them to an elder.........so i'm waiting in the mean time, advice pleez

Ding

Welcome!

I have sent you a PM.

You access them by clicking on the envelope in the upper right corner.

If you get an error message, click on it again.

wallsofjericho

first of all, welcome here! it's great to meet you, you will find a lot of help and support here. Be ready to hear a lot of people telling you to get as far away from the WTS as you can being you are young, single and have your whole life ahead of you. Many of us here are stuck b/c of spouses and kids.

trust me, tons here are unbelievabley jealous of you.

regarding your statement above

I wrote down a number of questions (eg, do the anointed around the world communicate? Whch is the most correct year for the fall of Jerusalem? Where Paul's letters inspired by the holy spirit?), n handed them to my bible teacher and she handed them to an elder.........so i'm waiting in the mean time, advice pleez

I hope you are ready for a world of hurt. This is going to get a major witch hunt rolling on you. You need to decide how your are going to answer their apostate finding questions.

Do you want to be DF'd or just fade? If you don't want to DF you are really going to need to tread water on this one...

ziddina

Hi there!!! Welcome to the board!!

The Watchtower Corporation induces a state of "infantilization" in its followers; that is, the more financially weak, insecure, and dependent they can make you, the more likely you are to lean on THEM for direction, instead of making your own [much BETTER-informed!!] decisions...

Your main course of action will be to reverse the process of "infantilization"... Develop the ability to stand on your own two feet, and you'll ve able to walk away from them.... And trust me, they KNOW THAT - that's why they frequently discourage Jehovah's Witnesses from obtaining higher educations...

So, here we go....

FIRST...

Build an ESCAPE ROUTE.

Get a better education, if you are still living at home with your parents. If you've dropped out of school, go back and get your high-school diploma - or a GED.

TELL YOUR PARENTS that you'll need the education to have a better chance at finding good "part-time" work, so you can eventually be more "active", if you have to tell them ANYthing...

SECOND...

Get a good part-time job and SAVE YOUR MONEY.

Again, if you have to tell your parents anything, just tell them that you're planning ahead for a rainy day, or in case this "system of things" lasts longer than a few months to a year, you'll need something to live on....

THIRD....

Get a BETTER EDUCATION....

This might involve 'trade school' (which the Watchtower Corporation LOVES - all those under-educated "blue-collar" workers sending all that lovely money to the Watchtower headquarters...)

Again, SAVE YOUR MONEY. I know that it will be VERY DIFFICULT at first, especially having been raised in a "Armageddon's coming tomorrow so we don't have to plan ahead, save our money, make long-term choices, deprive ourselves - might as well SPEND IT ALL NOW!" mentality

AVOID THAT MENTALITY LIKE THE PLAGUE.

ALSO AVOID GETTING ANYONE PREGNANT. That can KILL YOUR PLANS right then and there - a "bullet between the eyes", so to speak, for your long-term plans and benefit.

FOURTH

GET YOUR OWN APARTMENT/PLACE TO LIVE. NOTHING says "independence", like not having to be UNDER YOUR PARENTS' ROOF.

USE the opportunity to build up an education AND a financial cushion while you're living with your parents, THEN GET OUT OF THERE.

Trust me, your head will be so much clearer, after you've gotten your own place!! You'll also make adult strides like learning to do your own laundry, cooking, cleaning your living space, and paying your own bills.

These are lessons that will stand you in good stead, all throughout your life.

Plus, having your own place means YOU GET TO THINK YOUR OWN THOUGHTS - HAVE YOUR OWN OPINIONS - DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH without castigation or disapproval.

Learn as much as you can about what it takes to be an INDEPENDENT ADULT. And DO THOSE THINGS - save your money, get a better education, get training in a trade that's IN DEMAND - machining, mechanics, IT - whatever will give you as much financial stability and security as you can get. AVOID GETTING SOMEONE PREGNANT - LEARN ALL YOU CAN ABOUT BIRTH CONTROL METHODS, AND USE THEM!!!

The absolute LAST thing you want, is to get the Presiding Overseer's daughter preggers and HAVE TO MARRY HER!!! Your escape would be all "shot to hell", if THAT happened!!

Best results to you!!

Zid

Stealth

I think those nightmares are from the demons attacking you.

Welcome to the real world! Start living life!

Take things slow, do a lot of reading and not much talking about what you read unless you do it here.

Glad you see this while you are still young and have most of your life ahead.

elderelite

Confused, u are not alone or unusual. I am a grown man and an elder and when i came to understand what you are learnig, i woke in terrors and cold sweats too. Its realizing everything you "know" is a lie that shakes your world... Relax. It WILL get better. I promise. I will post more when i get home but just take a breath and realize: Jehovah aint gonna kill you. You have a long and happy life ahead. Life is good :-)

jam

First of all Welcome; Don,t make waves with your mom,

you are still young. You have an opportunity to research,

maybe while in school. We have all been there when we discover

the truth about the truth. The world is not that bad as Jw say

it is. You are now on A road that will lead you to great happiness.

A road that you alone have control of your own destiny.

dog is god

Everything is REALLY going to be OK. I mean it. Decide how you want to live your life and what kind of person you want to be. Then work towards that. Make goals....graduate high school...college...work. Don't forget to have respectable good times. Don't get involved with anything you wouldn't want printed on the front page of the newspaper or on TV. Your sleep will return. You have just had a big jolt of reality. When any religion says you can't read (fill in the blanks) (the Catholiks have banned books) ask WHY...What are THEY afraid of. Truth is truth and if you read something that shakes it up then it's not truth.

Adiva

I can't say anything that's not already been said so: WELCOME!! WARM HUGS TO YOU!

Adiva

rebel8

Keep your head down until you're able to move out on your own. Try to get along with your parents as much as you can.

Avoid doing field service or anything that could possibly influence others to become dubs, so you won't have it on your conscience later that you brought people into the religion.

Best wishes

now wat??

Share this