I assume at some point his family and such will try to do tell her that holidays are wrong and I am going to be annihilated. I have decided though that every year for her birthday we are going to have the biggest awesomest party for her, and guess who WONT be attending. Or at least if he does he will be the outcast. She will notice. Kids are very observant. Christmas time is now the time that I have decided that we will donate to charities, and volunteer for good causes. He does not partake in things like that at all. And how can he say Christmas is bad, if she sees how GOOD it is. She will notice. And, he will feel small.
He is a good dad to her. He loves her very much no doubt. I dont want to take that away from him, he is her daddy. But, at the same time if his idea of "training her up right" is to rob her of her free will, it is my job as her mother to protect her at all costs. And, I will. At first I was terrified of them, but watching how much the society cowers and works in passive aggressive ways and manipulates people doesnt scare me anymore. For one, I figured out how they work, and for two, I am not passive aggressive. I am confrontational, but rational. They dont have anything I want, so therefore I dont care if I have their approval. It doesnt mean spit to me.
I would also like to mention that about a month and a half after his mothers passing, the elders (after careful consideration) decided to let him back. I found some of the letters he wrote the congregation for his reinstatement, and all I can say is WOW. "I know you BROTHERS ARE BUSY, But if you could find it in YOUR HEARTS to forgive me..." Heavy stuff. I should also mention that after he was reinstated, we did continue dating. I kept my emotional distance this time, and was trying to feel him out and help him by planting seeds. After awhile though, I realized it is really up to him what he wants to do with the information. All I can do is be there for him.
