My son was murdered today (page 31)

still thinking

Hi truman...you are still in my thoughts everyday...I hope this post comes out...they seem to be disappearing on here lately

Black Sheep

I just can't imagine how tough it must be to try and put on a cloak of normality after your experience. I hope I never have to.

There is a txt on my phone from an old friend who is no longer with us. Every time I empty my messages I come across it and leave it there. It's nice.

I hadn't heard of Eckhart Tolle before. He sounds interesting. I'll have a look when I get some time.

(((((Anne)))))

Chris

TTWSYF

God bless you and your family Truman. I am so sorry to read how your son was taken from you so soon.

ammo

Hello truman,

I know each day must be so hard,

and things will never be the same, please know as well, how much you are in peoples thoughts, and how love and best intentions are being sent to you.

Ammo

x

Thanks, Chris, still thinking, MMXIV, ammo,and TTWSYF. I have never had so much care and support in my life as I have had from this board and friends offline during this ordeal. It is humbling and inspiring. I only wish that I could offer those who have encouraged me the satisfaction of some resolution or recovery. That goal, I know, is a long-term process. As I experience it now, it seems that a certain degree of compartmentalization becomes a strategy for coping. I cannot yet think about Glendon without overwhelming sadness for his loss. I want to scream at the universe, "give me my son back!" But to even indulge that exercise in impotence is to risk being swallowed by it myself. In order to function, I must keep my mind away from those thoughts. Yet, I cannot deny them their expression entirely. I hope that with time, I will be able to think of Glendon with dear remembrances of the priceless good memories of his life, but presently these are smothered by the sadness. I have to learn how to make this transition. It is a strange coincidence that a close neighbor also lost her adult son about a year ago (in completely different circumstances, but suddenly). I sat with her over our common experience yesterday, and I saw a woman immobilized in her grief. I feel very sad for her, because I know her pain. I understand how she is in this state, but I do not want to be where she is in a year's time.

still thinking

truman....I don't believe that allowing yourself time to grieve is indulgence. How you deal with it is how you deal with it. There is no right or wrong way. Even though you sense your own weekness when it come to dealing with the loss of your beautiful son. I see a strong, capable person...who is able to keep balance in her life. Your weekness is in fact a strength.

I take my hat off to you truman...you are also teaching us valuable lessons...even though you probably don't see that right now. We give to you becuase we care. You give to us, because you are a giving soul.

Sharing in anothers pain is a privilege...so much more so than sharing in anothers joy. It is an honest connection that is not often seen. We learn so much about ourselves through others.

What you are doing here, on this site is allowing us to see into your grief and share your pain...and by doing that, you are also helping others to deal with thier grief.

Be kind to yourself truman...you deserve it.

truman

Thanks very much, Still thinking, for showing me that perspective on sharing something like this. I hope that I can pay that debt forward in time though whatever small help I can give someone else.

I have had a good friend staying with me for the last two days, and that has helped me. I also had an unexpected experience with some healing energy through another channel today that has given me some modicum of peace to keep going. Actually, in this space of the two weeks that have passed, a number of unexpected blessings have come to me to help me process what has happened. I don't ever want to imply that anything could be compensation for the loss of Glendon, but some light does begin to shine through spaces in the fabric of darkness around me by means of these blessings in the aftermath.

Anne

still thinking

I'm so glad to hear things are looking a bit brighter today Anne...of course nothing could compensate for your loss...but at least you are open enough to see some light...you are doing incredibly well. Lets hope tomorrow is another peaceful day for you. I know how sorrow can come in waves....take the good days when you can, they help to give you strength and hope....but then, you know that already....

thinking of you today Anne.

still thinking

Thinking of you today Anne....and sending you love...

My son was murdered today

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