So when will I stop hating the organization?

loosie

I have tried to stop hating the organization and all it stands for, but in 7 years I've had to luck in doing so. I am going to therapy to work this out, but I still hate the WT borg. I have heard it is bad for you to hate something for so long. but how can you not hate a hider of child molesters? My therapist says it's like having worked for a terrible boss at a bad job, now that you no longer work there how often do you think about that job in your daily life? that makes sense but I think it goes deeper than that. I have tried not coming to this board for awhile to see if this hatred would stop but it didn't. I still can't stand them and the thought of Jw's makes me want to vomit.

So my question is when can I expect to get over the JW's?

Luci

elderelite

I wish i could give you a date and time, or offer something that would help. For me it was fairly brief, for others its a long process, but always personal. There is no right or wrong answer. I am glad that you are getting professional help, thats a positive thing and the advise seems sound to my untrained ears... Come what may, some feelings are best accepted and delt with as they are. You hate the org. Its what it is. Nothing wrong with disliking all the ill associated with a cult. Once acepted maybe it will help you in moving on....

Indian Larry

I couldn't tell you. I have known they were wrong for about 10 years. I have been on a serious fade for several years now. I used to really HATE them, slowly I believe I am moving more to a feeling like I just don't care anymore, but I am not there yet. As long as my wife and daughter are being mislead by them I guess I will lean towards the hate side. The only thing is, it is kind of like when you break up with a girlfriend or wife. As long as you hate her that means in some way you still care, when you get to the point you don't hate anymore that means you just don't care about them one way or the other. I think that is the goal.

One way that might help ease the hate you have is to remember that 95% of the JW's are simply being fooled themselves. I think even many on the GB believe thier own delusions, and if they don't what a miserable life that would be! Look at Rutherford, he was not deluded, he knew what he was doing. Yes he had nice cars during the depression, yes a lot of people looked up to him. However his own son would have nothing to do with him, his wife would have nothing to do with him, he was a drunk and he died of ass cancer. Plus when he died according to AC McMillian only 3 people went to the funeral.

So I guess when you get pissed just remember - Ass Cancer - that will make you smile.

BTW. I agree with the elderlite, getting professional help is good. I had some issues several years ago and 6 visits to a therapist helped me tremendously.

chichimama_2

I feel this way sometimes. Like I should just forget about it,let it go and move on with life.

I try and do pretty good for awhile but it just keeps creeping back up because I have more than one close family member who gets disfellowshipped and keeps going back because they still believe.

I have two close family members who are still JWs but struggling with terrible depression and suicidal thoughts.

They may not survive this cult. How am I supposed to forgive that?

It is so painful to watch and experience the destruction of family that this organization causes.

So, unless they ever cese to exist, or unless all my family members are out for good, I don't see getting completly over the anger ever happening for me.

My therapist says it's like having worked for a terrible boss at a bad job, now that you no longer work there how often do you think about that job in your daily life?

This shows that your therapist doesn't really understand how deep this goes. It may take more time for them to get enough info from you to really understand .

This was our entire life not just a bad church we went on Sundays for awhile or a bad job or boss!

Even though we chose to leave the organization ,it will affect us on some levels for the rest of our lives.

My family has been destroyed because of this cult. There are things that can never be mended.

I accept that but I am still angy.

We have a right to be.

Ranchette/Sheila

OnTheWayOut

I kind of imagine that hating Watchtower, while varying from person to person, doesn't really stop. It has more of a half-life. Whatever time it takes for you, say 10 years, it will mean that you think about it half as much after that time passes, then half of that again in another 10 years (or whatever is appropriate for you).

Even with such a theory, the first few months or years cause a buildup of the hate because of the information gathering, and when a huge story like the molester cover-ups comes along, it can add to the hate. But many here have left or seldom return. There's got to be some kind of average for thinking less and less about them.

designs

Hopefully the day after injustice ends.

panhandlegirl

I used to tell the JWs that came to my door about my lifelong experience as a JW and engage them in debate about their beliefs. One day, about 20 years after leaving the borg, I just stopped because I no longer cared about what they believed. I still don't like the borg and I never let a chance go by to tell people I know, who are not JWs, how bad that org, is. Like EL said, it's different for everyone.

witchtowerwitch

I have been gone out of there for over 20 years and i xxxx them even more now than when i left.They are a dangerous cult,protecting criminals,while threatening the victums and their families with df., if they report abuses to the police and the media.The illustration about a bad boss,is a bad one and doesn't even come close to comparing that with that fxxxed up mind control cult!tThe 3 basic rules of christianity are--- love,,,mercy,,and forgiveness,,,,,and the witchytower doesn't show or practice any of them!All they care about is money,control,and saving face,so how could anyone ever stop xxxing them?They have ruined my life...!I am old now,and have lost over 50 years of time,being betrayed by these a$$holes!It would take me 1000 years to forget,too bad i only have 10 to 30 years left,so you do the math?

exwhyzee

If JW's dissapeared off the face of the earth you will contntinue to hate them as long as you choose to or continue to get some sort of pay off from it.

Sometimes hating the "wrongs" that are done to us can become a running theme in our life and a distraction or excuse for whatever we feel may be lacking in our lives at present. For instance if somehow equality and fairness was granted to gay's, women, minorities, etc some people wouldn't know what to do with themselves. What would there be to rally around...who can we blame things on...what will I do with the time I used to spend on this ?

A cut can heal but it often leaves a scar. The more you pick at it the worse the scar will be. No matter how well it heals the skin will never be the same in that spot and you will think of what happened each time you notice it for some reason. How you react to the scar is up to you. It is a process but you have to be able to accept if for what it is and be willing to let it go. Visiting this site has been very helpful to me but I realize that it may be becoming a hinderance to my moving on and putting the hurt behind me once and for all. Each time we dewll on our experience with the WT it reinforces the story in our minds and deepens and prolongs the damage.

Hatred and anger are acids that eat through their own container.

life is to short

For me it is very hard. Every time I hear about or know about another case of a child molester being hidden in this religion my anger comes right back to the front. Like the Canti case it just makes me so mad that Candace had to go through all of that because the elders yet again hid a child molester in the stupid religion.

I just get so frustrated even on this board I just made a thread last week about the "Great Teacher" book and how on page 171 they show a little girl fending off a child molester by herself alone in her bedroom, yet ones on this board jumped on me saying I was desperate to bring down the religion. I was told I was a "bit dim" and "emotionally unstable/stupid." I was told there was nothing wrong with telling a child who had been raped by a child molester that the 'Devil and his demons, also Satan and his demons are behind it all.' That once a child has been molested he may begin to use his/her's sex organs in a wrong way.'

Many posters felt as this one put it so well (the advice was sensible.) That kind of response really makes wonder what this wrold is about how can anyone say that the advice makes sense. It just truly gets me not only upset but down and sad and yes mad. The picture on page 171 shows a five year old child fending off a child molester on her own alone and just because the books says she should say "stop that! I am going to tell on you!", many on this board felt it was very well written.

Indian Larry said it well here ( it is kind of like when you break up with a girlfriend or wife. As long as you hate her that means in some way you still care, when you get to the point you don't hate anymore that means you just don't care about them one way or the other. I think that is the goal.)
Anyway I digress I wish I could stop hating the organization but until ones, even ones on this board stop covering up for child molesters I do not know how I will.)

I have got to stop caring but when it comes to a child being abused I do not know how to, thus I still hate the organization.

LITS

So when will I stop hating the organization?

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