Hey Splash!
You sound like you are in a relatively good place mentally and spiritually, and keeping an even keel. Congratulations. No need to freak out yourself and those around you.
No blasting from this corner since I am an idealist who found himself thinking the same things until confronted with mounting realities regarding the true nature of all religious leaders as mostly irreformable enemies of the real Jesus and the full unabridged "good news".
The lantern you speak of does actually exist, and does make the Bible come to life and plain, without the need of human interpreters. I pray that you are led to the lantern. It is a journey though, and many peripheral questions remain - only one is now free to admit one does not know all the answers.
The lantern is the full unabridged "good news" which religious leaders deeply and secretly fear, hate and hide. "Franzgate 1980" has been secretly replayed tens of thousands of times in tens of thousands of congregations over many decades. I speak from personal experience.
You may want to ask yourself "what sort of spiritual food keeps people ignorant of the good news according to Paul, Moses, Isaiah and Psalms"?
A good starting point is to find and mark all the roughly 152 occurrences of the phrase "good news" in your Bible (by means of the wt lib search facility).
If you keep praying for spiritual revelation God will crack the code for you and the Bible will suddenly open up...
It starts with two keys without which no one enters. The first is when one is granted genuine repentance (awareness of dysfunction). The second is when one is granted genuine faith (a wide opening of our spiritual eyes).
Some of the most powerful ingredients of the map are IMPUTED righteousness, IMPUTED holiness, IMPUTED sinlessness and IMPUTED sonship available to any that would accept these as "free gifts" that cannot be earned, deserved or paid for.
Personally if I were allowed to read and understand only one book of the Bible and only one topic, it would be the "good news" in the book of Romans.